FanPost

Homer Hanky Mojo

Baseball Cardinal Rule: Don't Mess with Success.

I know why we lost Game 1 and Game 2.  I know why the Twins have lost 7 straight home playoff games.  It's not lack of clutch hitting, bullpen meltdowns, managerial decisions, or inside-the-park homeruns.  It's the Homer Hanky.

Back in '02, the Homer Hanky looked as it always did.  We won the ALDS.  All was well until we ran into the mojo of a Ralley Monkey.

The next year, the Strib and the Twins had the wonderful idea to start messing with the Homer Hanky.  First they decised it needed to be blue.  Yes, blue.  We lost 2 at home.  In '04 they made it an ugly picture of a baseball diamond.  We lost twice again.

This year, they really decided to screw it all up.  The design is better (though still not the original), and it's even red.  However, they've decided not to print enough.  Not enough at all.  About 45 minutes before each of the first two playoff games, they ran out.  THEY RAN OUT OF HOMER HANKIES.

Sure, they ran out in every game of the final series against the White Sox too.  If you remember, we lost 2 of 3.  For the playoffs, they ran out of them faster, and we lost both games.

In order to use the Homer Hanky mojo properly, you need roughly 90-95% of the fans to be waiving them.  30-40% don't cut it.  That's pathetic.  It's beyond pathetic.  We live in the 21st century here.  Don't tell me they couldn't print enough.  They simply didn't.

What, did they think people wouldn't buy them?  Did they think we'd be okay with only about a third of the fans clenching Homer Hankies?

Well, we're not okay.  We need our damn Homer Hankies.  If there is a Game 5, they'd better print about a half million.  -And they should change the design back to the old baseball design.  That's the way it should be.