Top 5 Things To Do During A Rain Delay

by Jesse on Apr 22, 2009 4:04 PM EDT in WTF

5. Let the rain refill your cup of generic American light beer, then notice upon drinking it that it doesn't taste more watered down than it did before the downpour.

4. Watch the kids caught in the rain having fun, not having a care in the world...while all the adults fight for space under awnings and umbrellas.

3. Discuss what Joe Mauer would look like without sideburns. Or with bigger sideburns. Or with bushier sideburns. You get the idea.

2. Take bets on whether the drunk guy climbing the foul pole falls off due to lightning striking the pole...or just his own idiocy.

And the number one thing to do during a rain delay...

1. Wait, tirelessly. Without anything to do. No matter how long the rain delay lasts, no matter how intense the downpour, wait. Why? Because you're a fan, dammit. Also because the person who drove you has had one too many Heinekens, and really, you don't want anyone who drinks Heineken at a baseball game to be in charge of anything...much less getting you home. Do you?

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No Limey Jokes

"You can't sit on a lead and run a few plays into the line and just kill the clock. You've got to throw the ball over the damn plate and give the other man his chance. That's why baseball is the greatest game of them all."
~ Earl Weaver
"In God we trust. All others must provide evidence."
~ Billy Beane

by AdamOnFirst on Apr 22, 2009 4:57 PM EDT reply actions

I know.

I figure I can’t go to that well every time out, can I?

by Jesse on Apr 22, 2009 5:23 PM EDT up reply actions

Bushier Burns

The only stat that counts is W

by wayback on Apr 22, 2009 5:08 PM EDT reply actions

Hahahaha

by Jesse on Apr 22, 2009 5:23 PM EDT up reply actions

Number 1

Why do you hate America, Jesse?

by Jon Marthaler on Apr 22, 2009 5:30 PM EDT reply actions

He's a Habs fan?

Proprietor of Hockey Wilderness - We take Minnesota hockey WAY too seriously.

by nathaneide on Apr 22, 2009 7:21 PM EDT up reply actions

I miss Honeyweiss.

by Jesse on Apr 22, 2009 7:30 PM EDT up reply actions

I'd pit the best American beer against your limey beer any day

Bells, Anchor Steam, Breckenridge, Fat Tire, Goose Island, Full Sail, Summit, the list goes on…

"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

by cmathewson on Apr 22, 2009 7:48 PM EDT up reply actions

MY limey beer?

by Jesse on Apr 23, 2009 2:03 PM EDT up reply actions

Yeah

You heard me. Next time you cross the pond, I challenge you to a battle of beers. The top six British beers by your estimation against the top six American beers by my estimation.

"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

by cmathewson on Apr 23, 2009 10:39 PM EDT up reply actions