Teh Internets is Serious Business!

by less cowbell, more 'neau on Aug 21, 2010 12:48 AM EDT

Remember this fanpost, Samples of White Sox Fans on the Twins by Jessy S? Here's a sample.

Click on the picture to make it bigger. Highlights are mine. The red line is what really caught my attention. To quote the Joker, "Why so serious?"

Many of us, including some folks from South Side Sox, got a good laugh out of it. Now it's taken a serious and yet somehow, even funnier turn. Link to the KSTP story

Online Mauer 'Threat' Misinterpreted
A possible death threat posted online against Twins star Joe Mauer turns out not to be as ill-willed as it sounds.

Minneapolis police alerted Chicago police after a blogger wrote, "die mauer".

I don't know if it was Jessy S who called the MPD or not. I'm not trying to pick on him. Apparently, KSTP contacted thatshortkid via email.

It turns out, "die mauer" actually means, "the wall" in German and the poster, a man from southern California, says he spent time in Berlin. It was actually a grudging compliment for the catcher. That's what he told 5 EYEWITNESS NEWS when we tracked him down. He told us by phone that despite Mauer making "a habit of crushing our dreams with swings of the bat," he means him no ill will.

A Minneapolis police spokesperson told 5 EYEWITNESS NEWS, "there's no reason to think this was a threat versus fans talking trash."

Here's what the "die mauer" commenter, thatshortkid, said on Jessy S.'s post:

wow, champ. "as plain as day", huh.
did you even bother doing a cursory google search? i know the internet might be new in your corner of east dakota, but damn:

http://www.google.com/search?q=die+mauer
http://images.google.com/images?q=die+mauer

boy, those germans! they have a different word for everything!

These events have me frightened and on the verge of evacuating my bowels.

by thatshortkid on Aug 13, 2010 7:19 PM CDT up reply actions

Pretty funny unless thatshortkid had ended up in a naked human pyramid in Guantanamo. OK, that might have been funny too. I guess the moral of the story is RELAX! I think we've all been guilty of taking ourselves or what someone has said on the internet too seriously at one time or another, including KSTP. Joe Mauer was never in any danger.

Thatshortkid relaxes at home after stepping on a rake.

OK, enough of this, back to my model trains.

Poll

All FanPosts should have a poll

Yes

27 votes

No

7 votes

Maybe

21 votes

I don't participate in polls

47 votes

102 votes | Poll has closed

Tweet Comment 37 comments | 7 recs |

Do you like this story?

Comments

I want to vote....

@#$& yes! on the poll, but that wasn’t a option….

polls suck.

"I couldn't do that. Could you do that? Why can they do it? Who are those guys?"

by maxisagod on Aug 21, 2010 12:56 AM EDT reply actions

Awesome FanPost.

by funnytrain on Aug 21, 2010 1:21 AM EDT reply actions

This is embarassing for TT and for Twins fans

If we were going to take things said on SSS like “die mauer” seriously, there’d be police reports on everyone who’s ever posted there, and probably on half the White Sox players too. Oh no, the White Sox are threatening to assault the Twins! They said they wanted to drill Mauer with a fastball! Someone call 911!

Whoever called the police on this should be ashamed. Police have limited resources… we shouldn’t waste their time and money (OUR money) on baseless internet “threats.” I thought it was crazy to take offense to SSS in the first place, but to call the police? Wow. We’ve wasted time for not only the Minneapolis PD, but also the Chicago PD. Hopefully they just ignored this “tip” as soon as they got it. And hopefully thatshortkid hasn’t been hassled too much from this.

so you can run and tell that, run and tell that, run and tell that
homeboy, home, home, homeboy

by what_would_gil_thorp_do on Aug 21, 2010 2:00 AM EDT reply actions 1 recs

I agree

A little less Jessy S posting in general would be nice.

by shmig on Aug 21, 2010 2:16 AM EDT up reply actions

no need for that

by clutterheart on Aug 21, 2010 6:56 AM EDT up reply actions

I didn't mean to be anti Jessy S

just anti-overreaction.

so you can run and tell that, run and tell that, run and tell that
homeboy, home, home, homeboy

by what_would_gil_thorp_do on Aug 21, 2010 10:35 AM EDT up reply actions

He has some very entertaining comments at times.

"Don't take life for granted, because tomorrow isn't promised to any one of us." -Kirby Puckett
"Dude, grit+hustle > 'the dark side'." -LNP

by less cowbell, more 'neau on Aug 22, 2010 9:09 AM EDT up reply actions

I like to think of Jessy S as the Jeff Passan of Twinkie Town

No matter what he writes about, I get worked up about it because he’s saying it in a way I don’t much care for, then get upset with myself that I got upset over it in the first place.

But seriously Jessy S, just calm down. If not for your sake, for the sake of those of us who react to your writing.

by bl4ckduck on Aug 22, 2010 11:14 AM EDT up reply actions

+1

Vikings considering signing Carl Pavano's moustache for 2010 season as backup QB, possibly attaching to Favre.

by carlpavanosmoustache on Aug 22, 2010 1:39 PM EDT up reply actions

Too much

trolling of SSS in general during the sox series.
I like to read it and their posters are super funny and lets face it, schadenfreude is fucking awesome.
But no need to react like a bunch of over sensitive wussies

by clutterheart on Aug 21, 2010 6:55 AM EDT up reply actions 1 recs

an occasional

dose of abuse is what trolling is good for. I’ve done it, as many of us have, and I understnd what it entails. I don’t take it seriously, and I am not thin skinned. SSS is funny, just know that they are not friendly like some other blogs, and they should never be confused as being

even tempered, model railroading, freckly faced fucks

Vikings considering signing Carl Pavano's moustache for 2010 season as backup QB, possibly attaching to Favre.

by carlpavanosmoustache on Aug 21, 2010 11:54 AM EDT up reply actions

+1

schadenfreude is even fun to say… but yeah I love to go SSS when the Twins beat the Sox b/c that’s when they do their best work…but it’s all in fun and no reason to get worked up over it.

remember, after they battle on the field, they probably all go out to eat, drink, and burn $100 bills b/c they’re rich for playing baseball. Well, expect for AJ, I doubt anyone likes him… please don’t call the cops on me for cyberbullying AJ, he likes the attention.

by caluofmn on Aug 25, 2010 11:17 AM EDT up reply actions

Rec'd.

My thoughts exactly.

by matty_b on Aug 21, 2010 1:14 PM EDT up reply actions

Agreed. As I mentioned in last night's gt, I talked to the reporter yesterday and he made it clear that everyone had a laugh over this. So hopefully resources weren't spread too thin on the hunt for thatshortkid.

heh

"Bee curful, dont wannur get sucked under der wheels like Mildreder's brudder ehr?"

by homesickalien on Aug 21, 2010 3:13 PM EDT up reply actions

Good that no one seems to have taken it seriously, I didn't see the gamethread

But the real tragedy here is that the phone call distracted the Minneapolis police from their real pursuit – model railroading. They were so close to finishing that tunnel!

so you can run and tell that, run and tell that, run and tell that
homeboy, home, home, homeboy

by what_would_gil_thorp_do on Aug 21, 2010 3:28 PM EDT up reply actions

Wow

may to sock it to Jessy S

It’s even better knowing they were in on the joke.

"It happened in the moment, and it happened." - Carlos Gomez

by myjah on Aug 21, 2010 8:22 PM EDT up reply actions

I voted maybe

It just seems like such an absurd answer.

"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

by cmathewson on Aug 21, 2010 11:13 AM EDT reply actions

Me too

for the same reason!

I always loved that one.

by FoulJack on Aug 21, 2010 2:31 PM EDT up reply actions

more absurd than

‘I don’t participate in polls"

too funny

by clutterheart on Aug 21, 2010 3:45 PM EDT up reply actions

Yeah, this was a huge, huge mistake on the part of whoever notified police.

I feel bad for thatshortkid, and really, the whole thing makes Twins fans/TwinkieTown look really, really stupid…of course, that’s in large part to KSTP as well. Good show all around, everyone.

JIMJAM: TATER MASHER EXTRAORDINAIRE

by fischean on Aug 21, 2010 11:50 AM EDT via mobile reply actions

no reason to feel bad for him,

no one took it seriously, thatshortkid got a few minutes of fame, his comments to KTSP were even humorous (‘twisted knickers’) and SSS got a huge laugh out of it at our expense.

good times had by all.

My life's goal: to force fischean itno using her moderator powers

by montanatwinsfan on Aug 21, 2010 12:12 PM EDT up reply actions

At the moment, this tops the list of most read stories at KSTP.com

15 minutes of fame for thatshortkid

so you can run and tell that, run and tell that, run and tell that
homeboy, home, home, homeboy

by what_would_gil_thorp_do on Aug 21, 2010 2:50 PM EDT reply actions

By the way, this fanshot is totally rec'd.

If I could rec it 16 more times I would.

I always loved that one.

by FoulJack on Aug 21, 2010 2:51 PM EDT reply actions

Yeah, this thing got blown out of proportion.

by Jesse on Aug 21, 2010 3:49 PM EDT reply actions

Haven't laughed this hard for a long time

Thanks

"It happened in the moment, and it happened." - Carlos Gomez

by myjah on Aug 21, 2010 4:23 PM EDT reply actions

I have tears in my eyes right now.

"it’s over, tdogg.

no. it’s not unlike me. when i make an unqualified statement, it means i’m sure i’m right" Larry

by Tdogg on Aug 21, 2010 6:52 PM EDT reply actions

Since you are a Sox fan, I assume you must have shouted "die mauer!" until you were blinded by threatening, rage-filled tears

We should probably call the cops on you.

so you can run and tell that, run and tell that, run and tell that
homeboy, home, home, homeboy

by what_would_gil_thorp_do on Aug 21, 2010 7:43 PM EDT up reply actions

This whole thing is quite unbelievable

I can not stop laughing…

"it’s over, tdogg.

no. it’s not unlike me. when i make an unqualified statement, it means i’m sure i’m right" Larry

by Tdogg on Aug 21, 2010 7:20 PM EDT reply actions

Please also see

This thread and this thread. Even though they pale in comparison.

so you can run and tell that, run and tell that, run and tell that
homeboy, home, home, homeboy

by what_would_gil_thorp_do on Aug 21, 2010 7:37 PM EDT up reply actions

Holy crap.

How did I not see the post about Manny playing shortstop? That’s incredible.

by matty_b on Aug 22, 2010 1:42 AM EDT up reply actions

Personally

The Chris Carter one caused me to laugh so friggin’ hard

Vikings considering signing Carl Pavano's moustache for 2010 season as backup QB, possibly attaching to Favre.

by carlpavanosmoustache on Aug 22, 2010 1:58 PM EDT up reply actions

I think it's time to make him a regular contributor on this here site

by bl4ckduck on Aug 22, 2010 11:18 AM EDT up reply actions

Yes, The View Askew

WARNING…. no eating or drinking while reading Jessy S comments, as laughter may cause food and drink to pass through nose. TT and SB nation assume no responsibility for laundry or dry cleaning expenses

Vikings considering signing Carl Pavano's moustache for 2010 season as backup QB, possibly attaching to Favre.

by carlpavanosmoustache on Aug 22, 2010 1:45 PM EDT up reply actions

That. is. awesome.

Got a real winner there in that Jesse S. Not to be confused with Jesse we found out, who we at SSS appreciate for her/his sense of humor.

Time to call in the Q!avalry.

by ScottyPods Ver2.0 on Aug 23, 2010 4:46 PM EDT reply actions

Not to be confused because their names aren't even spelled the same.

Also, I know it’s hard to believe there are more than one pair of twisted knickers roaming the internets, but nobody knows for certain that Jessy S was responsible for this, just because he/she seems like the obvious choice for finger-pointing.

Not saying, just saying.

"Bee curful, dont wannur get sucked under der wheels like Mildreder's brudder ehr?"

by homesickalien on Aug 23, 2010 8:20 PM EDT up reply actions