Should the Royals nab Joe Mauer?

At least that is the question posed to Royals fans at SB Nation site Royals Review. The premise goes something like this: Both North and South Dakota unite to form their own nation and take Minnesota with them. As a result the new nation of Dakotasota loses the Twins, and all current contracts are guaranteed meaning that someone would be on the hook for $23 million owed to Mauer through the 2018 season.

7 months ago Jessy S 8 comments 1 recs |

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Dakotasota? Hmm...

Well there a a lot Minnesotans than N. Dakotans so I guess we could push them around and still be a nuclear-armed, petroleum rich superpower, I suppose it depends on whether we join Canada or become a separate nation-state. S Dakota could bring…um, some giant heads on mountain.

If we go independent, then Michelle Bachmann would probably be our de facto ~~Fürher~~ Glorious Leader since she’s in the national spotlight. With her finger on the nuclear button, I would dare WI to try something funny. Go ahead, Sconnies, feelin’ lucky, punks? Didn’t think so.

So I’m in favor of it but I think we could still keep the Twins. After all, the MLB didn’t make Canada give up the ~~Expos~~ Blue Jays. So Mauer’s no-trade clause would still be intact.

No more God Bless America during the 7th inning stretch either, we’d just sing Take me out to the Ballgame, and There’s more to Explore in Minnekota instead.

"Don't take life for granted, because tomorrow isn't promised to any one of us." -Kirby Puckett
"Millar nice shirt lol my god awesome lol only u can do that lol" -Ozzie Guillen

by less cowbell, more 'neau on Oct 26, 2011 10:26 PM EDT reply actions 3 recs

And have Joe Mauer sing even if he is batting lead-off.

I'm a proud fan of the Minnesota Twins and Dallas Cowboys!
"Life is precious and time is a key element. Let’s make every moment count and help those who have a greater need than our own." – Harmon Killebrew
Champagne SuperTolbert Saves the day!!!

by Jessy S on Oct 27, 2011 1:11 AM EDT up reply actions

Rec'd

The other teams could make trouble for us if they win. — Yogi Berra

by Twnzfan on Oct 27, 2011 12:54 PM EDT up reply actions

It will never cease to amaze me

how people can take a made-up, never-in-a-million years scenario and actually spend time discussing “What would we do if…?” How about:

What if flubber was real and ballplayers put it on their shoes? Who would jump the highest?

What if the Yankees decided to give away all their good players? Would that include Nick Swisher?

What if steroid use caused Alex Rodriguez to grow a third arm? Would that help him?

What if Bill Smith made some smart moves this off-season? Naw…that’s too far-fetched…

The other teams could make trouble for us if they win. — Yogi Berra

by Twnzfan on Oct 27, 2011 12:53 PM EDT reply actions 5 recs

Amazing.

Rec’d.

by Jesse on Oct 27, 2011 1:36 PM EDT up reply actions

I know

But you have to admire Royals Review for having the gall to do a post like this. I felt I had to post this fanshot because Mauer’s health and performance was a big topic during the season.

by Jessy S on Oct 28, 2011 12:47 AM EDT up reply actions