You Live in a World Where Don Kelly and Delmon Young Beat the Yankees
Thoughts on last night's game:
- An AL Central team can beat the Yankees in the playoffs. We have evidence of this now. Turns out that all the Twins need is better defense, offense, health, Justin Verlander and Doug Fister.
- If you missed it, here's Joaquin Benoit removing a bandage from his face last night.
- Jose Valverde is going to blow a save in either the ALCS or the World Series, and it's going to be an epic, Lidge-to-Pujols core dump. Mark it.
- More thoughts after I finish this delicious Wolf Cola. Wolf Cola: it's the right cola for closure.
- Joe Girardi has called the server over five times this morning to adjust his breakfast order.
- Why SportsCenter is Awful, Part XVII: the Tigers defeated the Yankees, so let's talk about what the future holds for the Yankees the next 20 gotdamn minutes.
- Now that New York has been dispatched, I'm directing all my ill will to the Milwaukee Brewers. I have nothing against them personally, and the very thought of Carlos Gomez vs. Nick Punto in the NLCS gives me shivers of pure delight, but we don't need Wisconsin getting any haughtier than they already are. They have the best pro football team, one of the best college football teams, and the New Glarus Brewery. Screw 'em. Go D'Backs.
There are two more [redacted] Game 5s today. Will throw up a thread for them later in the day.
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Agreed on the Brewers
The CF platoon of Gomez and Morgan tips the balance for me disliking them.
"I learned something yesterday. No use in having rules if there's no punishment for breaking them. You'll be fine if you bite down on the trigger. Enjoy your breakfast."
If this makes you feel worse
Since 02, the Yanks are 26-31 in postseason games against non-Twins teams.
by Gunnarthor on Oct 7, 2011 10:22 AM EDT reply actions 1 recs
Valverde blowing a save in the ALCS or WS would be the highlight of my baseball
season. I so wanted to see Elmon take the zigzag route to a lazy fly ball to lose the division series, so if the oblique keeps him out of this series, I’ll just have to root for the blown save.
I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy!!!
The highlight of my season would be
Seeing Carlos Gomez in the WS against the Tigers, and then watch him kiss his bat right before hitting a fly ball to the warning track that Elmon runs towards the infield to catch initially then retreats picks it on a one hop off the wall throws to the second baseman who relays it to first where Gomez (and his ridiculous speed) overruns the base and ends up being out. It would be the greatest reflection of why the two were traded.
It would be epic.
"We're all in this together. Except me - I'm retiring because you guys f*%King suck, and there's no God-D@mned way I'm wasting any more of my summers traveling cross country with this group of fail. Bill Smith can suck my c@%k!"
-Actual quote from John Gordon via montanatwinsfan
I've had some time to think about how former Twins might screw up their team's chances
"We're all in this together. Except me - I'm retiring because you guys f*%King suck, and there's no God-D@mned way I'm wasting any more of my summers traveling cross country with this group of fail. Bill Smith can suck my c@%k!"
-Actual quote from John Gordon via montanatwinsfan
Awesome - and the best part about that is...
….in case the Cards beat out the Crew, Punto could easily replace Gomez in that scenario – except it’s not his blinding speed that causes him to over-run the base, it’s his preference to ignore his base coach’s sign and judge for himself why the crowd is cheering instead.
"...and we'll see ya tomorrow night!" - Jack Buck, Game 6, 1991 World Series
by WindyCityTwinsFan on Oct 8, 2011 12:06 PM EDT up reply actions
Yes, we're bitter
I was thinking the same thing about Valverde: there’s a big Gary Anderson moment yet to come. Maybe he has a fake shoot-himself-in-the head move he hasn’t needed to pull out yet.
And why DO we have to drive 30 miles to get New Glarus?
That's absurd!
Jose Morales outrighted by the Rockies
He’s available. Will the Twins bring him back?
He's better than what we have, but would he be willing to come back?
I'd rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy!!!
It's just so, so...so very special.
Yes. Special.
WordUpThome: BOOM, HAND HUGGED
Tweet me! @jessicann713
by fischean on Oct 7, 2011 1:12 PM EDT via mobile up reply actions
It is a fun graphic
but THEY’RE MAKING IT INTO A STRUCTURE!!!! I cannot find the words to express my feelings about this.
Here it is being built.

"Don't take life for granted, because tomorrow isn't promised to any one of us." -Kirby Puckett
"I am laughing right now. Am I insane?" Jessy S
by less cowbell, more 'neau on Oct 7, 2011 3:58 PM EDT up reply actions
At least its not obscenely huge
"We're all in this together. Except me - I'm retiring because you guys f*%King suck, and there's no God-D@mned way I'm wasting any more of my summers traveling cross country with this group of fail. Bill Smith can suck my c@%k!"
-Actual quote from John Gordon via montanatwinsfan
what's really sad is they are going to have real Marlins perform the feat
Come see all your favorite EPIC fails @ www.minnesotatwins.com!
Wow
I can’t look away… the fish keep jumping.
by ColossusOfRhode on Oct 7, 2011 1:40 PM EDT up reply actions
I saw this and got a headache
Then I saw the article where this was actually something the Marlins were building and became nauseous.
How does this happen? Who thinks this is a good idea?
"We're all in this together. Except me - I'm retiring because you guys f*%King suck, and there's no God-D@mned way I'm wasting any more of my summers traveling cross country with this group of fail. Bill Smith can suck my c@%k!"
-Actual quote from John Gordon via montanatwinsfan
Not that their logo will be any better

I take it that Missoni Designer that worked with Target now works for the Marlins. How much are they going to have to pay players to wear that???
My eyes are bleeding now I need to find a kleenex…..
"We're all in this together. Except me - I'm retiring because you guys f*%King suck, and there's no God-D@mned way I'm wasting any more of my summers traveling cross country with this group of fail. Bill Smith can suck my c@%k!"
-Actual quote from John Gordon via montanatwinsfan
OK, Jeffrey Loria, We Get That You Utterly Despise and Loathe Baseball
So why don’t you go do something else with your time and money? Why must you torment those of us who still care about the game? Why? Dear Lord, Why? Even Charlie Finley knew at least some bounds.
This
If Carnival and Las Vegas had a baby, this would be the placenta. If Charlton Heston ever lands on Planet of the Fish, this will be their version of the "It’s a Small World" ride. This is what would happen if Vikings attacked a Gloria Estefan concert by catapulting flamingos and marlins into the pyrotechnics display.
"We're all in this together. Except me - I'm retiring because you guys f*%King suck, and there's no God-D@mned way I'm wasting any more of my summers traveling cross country with this group of fail. Bill Smith can suck my c@%k!"
-Actual quote from John Gordon via montanatwinsfan
by Go Twins! on Oct 7, 2011 2:18 PM EDT up reply actions 2 recs
Ye Gods
I didn’t know it was real. I thought it was the intro graphic to some kind of “Exciting Thai Boys Love Now, Membership Free Exotic Delights $15.99 One Week Trial” or some such. Not that I’d know about these things (gulp)
Steve Goodman lives.
They are also apparently going to be playing in the Condome
I don’t know if baseball clubs have a sexuality, and I honestly don’t have anything against the LGBT community, but call me crazy something is seriously gay with this club…..
(Please nobody take that the wrong way – I hope this understood to be humorous)
"We're all in this together. Except me - I'm retiring because you guys f*%King suck, and there's no God-D@mned way I'm wasting any more of my summers traveling cross country with this group of fail. Bill Smith can suck my c@%k!"
-Actual quote from John Gordon via montanatwinsfan
If they're embracing the LGBT world
And trying to corner that market, God bless ’em. That might actually be interesting.
If they’re just doing this all by mistake, then . . . (Keanu Reeves in “The Matrix” voice) . . . whoah.
Steve Goodman lives.
Thats what I was trying to say I guess
its a bit odd
"We're all in this together. Except me - I'm retiring because you guys f*%King suck, and there's no God-D@mned way I'm wasting any more of my summers traveling cross country with this group of fail. Bill Smith can suck my c@%k!"
-Actual quote from John Gordon via montanatwinsfan
I'm only disturbed that you could quote the price
Come see all your favorite EPIC fails @ www.minnesotatwins.com!
OOOOH!
I…can’t…stop….watching….
"Don't take life for granted, because tomorrow isn't promised to any one of us." -Kirby Puckett
"I am laughing right now. Am I insane?" Jessy S
by less cowbell, more 'neau on Oct 7, 2011 3:41 PM EDT up reply actions
And the Twins complained the trees at Target Field were distracting?
"Don't take life for granted, because tomorrow isn't promised to any one of us." -Kirby Puckett
"I am laughing right now. Am I insane?" Jessy S
by less cowbell, more 'neau on Oct 7, 2011 4:00 PM EDT up reply actions 1 recs
+1
"We're all in this together. Except me - I'm retiring because you guys f*%King suck, and there's no God-D@mned way I'm wasting any more of my summers traveling cross country with this group of fail. Bill Smith can suck my c@%k!"
-Actual quote from John Gordon via montanatwinsfan
This is sick
Seriously, this puts the Liberty Bell, Big Apple, and Minny and Paul to shame. At least it usurps the White Sox exploding scoreboard.
I'm a proud fan of the Minnesota Twins and Dallas Cowboys!
"Life is precious and time is a key element. Let’s make every moment count and help those who have a greater need than our own." – Harmon Killebrew
Champagne SuperTolbert Saves the day!!!
holy crap
note to self if ever in Miami go to Marlins game on extacy
wtf is this organization doing lol its stupid enough they built a new stadium for a team that draws less than 10k fans a game in a state where they have 2 teams that is full of people who dont care about baseball or have moved there and hold hometown allegiances, but now they are gonna put this monstrosity in centerfield and rock the tron gay pride logo just wow. I really hope that they get Zambrano now think of the epic fist fight that will ensue when Ozzie trys to pull him early and they are both dressed up in that crap with this thing as the backdrop.
Miami is truly going to be a circus Ozzie, Lomo, Hanley, maybe Zambrano can they trade for AJ too? There are gonna be some epic press conferences coming out of that clubhouse.
first-worst-first?
Also
never understood why we’re so jealous of New Glarus. I’d take Surly any day.
by archie2227 on Oct 7, 2011 12:05 PM EDT reply actions 1 recs
Yes
but one thing people tend to ignore when it comes to prices is abv. Four 16 oz Furios @ 6.5% packs more punch than six 12 oz @ 5%. Less liquid same effect.
It tastes really good
So why is less liquid better?
Personal preference is all
Less peeing lol. It’s just an argument I get all the time from light beer drinkers. “Why would I spend 12 dollars on 4 beers when I can get 12 for the same price!”
“Because my four beers have about the same amount of alcohol as your 12. You’re drinking more water. Congrats”
/beersnob
Also Spotted Cow
was a bit of a letdown for me. After hearing MNers talk it up to absurd levels, I tried it and was left with the impression that is was no better than OK.
We aren't trying to accomplish the same thing
I tend to have a beer with a meal and stop at one. 16oz is less desirable.
Light beer....
Who on their right mind puts calories on beers in the first place?
Nevermind, I’m not going to start…
by twinscrazy_german on Oct 8, 2011 6:33 AM EDT up reply actions
2006
We had evidence an AL Central team could beat the Yankees in the playoffs in 2006.
In fact, the Yankees of the last decade kinda suck if you take out the Twins as opponents.
And 2007
An AL Central team did it in 2007, too. Really it’s kind of amazing the Royals haven’t done it.
I remember when
SportsCenter was witty and informative.
Yes, I am approximately 103 years old.
Can’t stomach the thing for more than about 35 seconds now. The commercials are still occasionally cute.
Steve Goodman lives.
I'm hoping now that the Yankees are eliminated, they'll get the New York fetish out of their system
But this is probably a foolish hope.
by ColossusOfRhode on Oct 7, 2011 1:42 PM EDT up reply actions
The Twins have watched the Yankees get eliminated for years now
By teams from every division. Why would this particular time set off any lightbulbs? Not that the playoffs are even a concern for the Twins at this point.
Loving the Delmon trade right now
just absolutely loving it!!!!
The beard abides.
by Jason Kubel's Beard on Oct 7, 2011 1:43 PM EDT reply actions
Your caption is wrong:
Should read “Sad Yankees fan is Delicious.”
"You can't sit on a lead and run a few plays into the line and just kill the clock. You've got to throw the ball over the damn plate and give the other man his chance. That's why baseball is the greatest game of them all."
~ Earl Weaver
"In God we trust. All others must provide evidence."
~ Billy Beane

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