We Need a Home Run Call


Per the eminently follow-able Jake Nyberg on Twitter, new Twins play-by-play voice Cory Provus doesn't have a trademark home run call, a la John Gordon's "Waaaay back and CAUGHT by the shortstop." Nyberg suggested that Twins fans come up with suggestions using the #CallsforCory hashtag. A capital idea, but one that needn't be limited to that medium and its 140 characters. Herewith are mine, which you may add to in our comments section:

  • "Toast points!"
  • "You can kiss that one goodbye with tongue!"
  • "Jesus, he hit that one f---ing hard. Damn."
  • "It all burns in the fire!"
  • "This home run brought to you by Golden Corral's new Chocolate Fountain!"
  • "Light up a cig, youngsters!"
  • "Tickle my ass with a feather!"
  • "SQUEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
  • "Suck. It."
  • "We all die alone!"
  • "That ball is punished like the captives in my underground sex dungeon!"
  • "K-k-k-kenny Geeeeeeeee!"
  • "We will see you At The Movies!"
  • "Show me on the doll where the home run touched you!"
  • "Down goes Frazier!"
  • "I'm MTV's Julie Brown!"
  • "Ph'nglui mglw'nafh Cthulhu R'lyeh wgah'nagl fhtagn!"
  • "Is this your homework Larry?"
  • "That ball is HGH-ed!"
  • "Four banana, three banana, two banana, one!"
  • "404 File Not Found, Motherf-----!"
  • "He's the DJ, I'm the Rapper!"
  • "Baseball vernacular!"
  • "Free peanuts for Telly!"
  • "Shop Smart! Shop S-Mart!"
  • "You're not fooling me, Ansel Adams!"
  • "That home run > Tebow"
  • "Into the mud, scum queen!"
  • "Just like all you stoners out there, that ball is high as hell!"
  • "And that ball is...you know what, I'm just never gonna be Vin Scully. I try and try and try, but it's just impossible. It'll never happen. It's not that I'm unsure of my own talent, I think I'm pretty good at what I do, in fact. It's just that he's set such a standard with his body of work that's it's useless to even try. Should have gone to med school like Dad said. Home run."
  • "Deep and hard! Deep and hard! Deep and hard!"
  • "The Giving Tree still makes me cry!"
  • "WHERE'S THE BIRTH CERTIFICATE?"
  • "Shut UP, Gladden."
  • "Hot Freaks!"
  • "A = A!"
  • "Gathering of the Juggalos!"
  • "Garmonbozia!"
  • "You are NOT the father!"
SB Nation Featured Video
X
Log In Sign Up

forgot?
Log In Sign Up

Forgot password?

We'll email you a reset link.

If you signed up using a 3rd party account like Facebook or Twitter, please login with it instead.

Forgot password?

Try another email?

Almost done,

By becoming a registered user, you are also agreeing to our Terms and confirming that you have read our Privacy Policy.

Join Twinkie Town

You must be a member of Twinkie Town to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Twinkie Town. You should read them.

Join Twinkie Town

You must be a member of Twinkie Town to participate.

We have our own Community Guidelines at Twinkie Town. You should read them.

Spinner.vc97ec6e

Authenticating

Great!

Choose an available username to complete sign up.

In order to provide our users with a better overall experience, we ask for more information from Facebook when using it to login so that we can learn more about our audience and provide you with the best possible experience. We do not store specific user data and the sharing of it is not required to login with Facebook.

tracking_pixel_9351_tracker