Cuddyer's Gone, Willingham's Here, and All Your Minor League Free Agents Are Belong to Us (UPDATE 9:45 am)

by RandBall's Stu on Dec 16, 2011 10:28 AM EST in News

BUT CAN YOU DO MAGIC TRICKS SIR? I THINK NOT!

Here's what we know as of Friday AM:

Michael Cuddyer: Jon Heyman is reporting that he gone. (UPDATE: Heyman also reporting that it's three years, $31.5 million. Whoa.) Yesterday, it seemed that there was a legitimate possibility that the Twins would bring the much-loved veteran back. Now, reality seems to have set in (a defensive outfield with Josh Willingham and Michael Cuddyer + no upgrades to the starting staff = Benny Hill theme), and the Denver Post is reporting that the Colorado Rockies "are increasingly confident" that they will sign him. The numbers are alleged to be three years, $27 million. He will be missed, but the Twins got a roughly comparable outfielder (Parker thinks he's better than comparable) for less money plus draft picks. I wholeheartedly endorse this move, thus assuring that it'll probably end up being wrong, because I'm dumb.

All of the minor-league free agents: we’ve got ‘em. It’s clear that the organization doesn’t want Rochester to be an embarrassment for a third year running, so they’ve gone out and signed 7439 free agents to minor league deals. The most notable names, besides one of the Two Renes (Rivera, in this case) are former prized prospects Steve Pearce, J.R. Towles and Sean Burroughs.

Josh Willingham: officially signed. His wife even bought their kids some Twins gear, so it’s serious now.

Bill Smith: re-titled. Although speculation in the comments sections of Twins blogs was that his new title would be "Big Dumb Stupidhead," Joe C. reports that Smith is now Assistant to the President and General Manager. Twinkie Town has not been able to confirm if he will be wearing a shirt or not in his new role with the team.

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Good luck to Cuddyer

Now let’s get some non-Jeff Francis pitchers.

"I learned something yesterday. No use in having rules if there's no punishment for breaking them. You'll be fine if you bite down on the trigger. Enjoy your breakfast."

by John_Locke on Dec 16, 2011 10:31 AM EST reply actions

In fairness to Smith

We really did a nice job of improving our work in Latin America while he was GM. That seems to be a strength of his, hope he continues to do well focusing on that. And best wishes to Cuddy.

by Gunnarthor on Dec 16, 2011 10:32 AM EST reply actions 1 recs

Sano

If Sano becomes a superstar, Billy can hang his hat on signing him.

by Alexi Casilla All-Star on Dec 18, 2011 9:23 PM EST up reply actions

I saw a lot of him in OKC last year….he’s solid defensively. He doesn’t hit well, but has a little more pop than Butera when he accidentally makes contact. Very solid Triple-A starter and third catcher on the organizational depth chart. Better than Rivera, at least.

by bbeeck on Dec 16, 2011 10:34 AM EST reply actions

Put him ahead of Drew please

If Towles can hit a little bit and play good defense, I hope he would get the nod before the proven ineptitude of Butera.

by Alexi Casilla All-Star on Dec 18, 2011 9:25 PM EST up reply actions

CUDDY!

"Don't take life for granted, because tomorrow isn't promised to any one of us." -Kirby Puckett
"Tell Gardy there's nobody around to protect him now." Ozzie Guillen

by less cowbell, more 'neau on Dec 16, 2011 10:35 AM EST reply actions 1 recs

The last of the 2002 Jedi!

Gone.

"Don't take life for granted, because tomorrow isn't promised to any one of us." -Kirby Puckett
"Tell Gardy there's nobody around to protect him now." Ozzie Guillen

by less cowbell, more 'neau on Dec 16, 2011 10:41 AM EST up reply actions

I'm with you!

Now they have to update that “All True Twins” roster. *sniff*sniff*

(Although damn, $31,500,000 is a lot of money.)

by ColossusOfRhode on Dec 16, 2011 12:12 PM EST up reply actions

Why Not both Cuddy and willingham

Screw the rockiies, Cuddyer belongs with the Twins… We need him. If our 1st basemen goes down again at least well have the best position player here in a Twins uniform.
The 100 million thing if your gonna win a championship there is players out there that can help us. So what if 112 million the Twins are investing veterns and youth movement for the future. I say sign ed jackson as well. find another RP as well. I like Rick Anderson our pitching coach i think he will bring Jackson along fine. Money so what open the wallet and Lets Win!!!
If Cuddy leaves Good luck i know i will miss seeing #5 out in Target Field.

by twinssdfan on Dec 16, 2011 10:41 AM EST reply actions

Heyman says 31.5 M over 3 years for Cuddyer

Wow.

"I learned something yesterday. No use in having rules if there's no punishment for breaking them. You'll be fine if you bite down on the trigger. Enjoy your breakfast."

by John_Locke on Dec 16, 2011 10:43 AM EST reply actions

Really?

Wow. Good for Cuddy and his agent.

by Gunnarthor on Dec 16, 2011 10:45 AM EST up reply actions

At that price, they can have him.

by Flip27 on Dec 16, 2011 10:47 AM EST up reply actions

Twins made a fair offer

Cuddyer is not worth $10M more than Willingham.

by DJL44 on Dec 16, 2011 11:09 AM EST up reply actions

Hooray for a good terry Ryan move!

by Flip27 on Dec 16, 2011 12:05 PM EST up reply actions

The market says otherwise

by That'sWhatSheSaid on Dec 16, 2011 1:08 PM EST up reply actions

One team =/= The market

Otherwise you could say that the Nationals signed Jayson Werth to market neutral contract.

Sometimes GMs just lose their minds.

by Flip27 on Dec 16, 2011 2:28 PM EST up reply actions

I find it funny that several Rockies fans think he is going to play 3B for them

Let loose the hogs of war!
Dogs of war..
Whatever farm animal of war, Lana...

by darren004 on Dec 16, 2011 11:15 AM EST up reply actions

There's your answer, twinsdfan

"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

by cmathewson on Dec 16, 2011 11:23 AM EST up reply actions

Your right, cmathewson

Do we 1 draft pick or two for his departure?

by twinssdfan on Dec 16, 2011 1:07 PM EST up reply actions

2: A sandwich and a second rounder

"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

by cmathewson on Dec 16, 2011 1:09 PM EST up reply actions

Mmmmmm

Sandwich

by DJL44 on Dec 16, 2011 2:12 PM EST up reply actions

"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

by cmathewson on Dec 16, 2011 3:14 PM EST up reply actions

mm...

that looks unbelievable.

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 4:48 PM EST up reply actions

Yup.

by RandBall's Stu on Dec 16, 2011 10:48 AM EST reply actions

As much as i hate to say it...

I have to 31.5 million for cuddy well good for him.
well take the draft pick and find another good player!
I really thought he stay a twin!

by twinssdfan on Dec 16, 2011 10:52 AM EST reply actions

Torii Hunter redux

Would’ve been nice for him to retire a Twin, but it would’ve been insane to keep him at that price.

by RandBall's Stu on Dec 16, 2011 11:01 AM EST reply actions

NOOOOOOOOO!

Remember, remember the seventh of November.

by Go Twins! on Dec 16, 2011 11:02 AM EST reply actions

That seems an awful lot.

Let loose the hogs of war!
Dogs of war..
Whatever farm animal of war, Lana...

by darren004 on Dec 16, 2011 11:03 AM EST reply actions

Chris Parmelee

should be our 1B. Morneau at DH.

by y2jayjk on Dec 16, 2011 11:05 AM EST reply actions

There are better 1B available for not much

There is no reason to go into a season with Parmelee as the starting 1B when guys like Derrek Lee are available for not much dough.

by DJL44 on Dec 16, 2011 11:09 AM EST up reply actions

I would be happy with Lee

But hopeful he is primarily the DH with Morneau playing every day.

In light of 31/3, 21/3 looks like a steal, especially when you factor in picks.

"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

by cmathewson on Dec 16, 2011 11:24 AM EST up reply actions

Wouldn't mind Lee either!!!

Because i heard through the grapevine Kubal does not want to come back to the Twins.
If he did i would shocked!

by twinssdfan on Dec 16, 2011 7:35 PM EST up reply actions

"I wholeheartedly endorse this move, thus assuring that it'll probably end up being wrong, because I'm dumb."

I almost spewed my morning coffee after reading that line. Had to put the mug down until I finished reading, which turned out to be a good thing as "Although speculation in the comments sections of Twins blogs was that his new title would be “Big Dumb Stupidhead,”" would have certainly would have gotten me.

by socalminfan on Dec 16, 2011 11:25 AM EST reply actions

agreed!

thank everything good and holy that Randball Stu is here to make us laugh!

I don't know, but I've been told it's hard to run with the weight of gold,
'the other hand, I've heard it said, it's just as hard with the weight of lead.

by montanatwinsfan on Dec 16, 2011 12:34 PM EST up reply actions

More on this at the draft thread, but if I had to hazard a guess at the Twins' picks...

based on the remaining 11 unsigned compensation-ranking FA’s, the Twins will end up with:

#2, #33, #43, #63, #72, #95.

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 11:28 AM EST reply actions

for the first 3 rounds.

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 11:28 AM EST up reply actions

Can't stop smiling at that

We haven’t had that kind of draft position since 2004. Oh wait, what?

"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

by cmathewson on Dec 16, 2011 11:32 AM EST up reply actions

With the new CBA

We may never get one like that again.

"I couldn't do that. Could you do that? Why can they do it? Who are those guys?"

by maxisagod on Dec 16, 2011 11:41 AM EST up reply actions

yep.

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 11:42 AM EST up reply actions

great opportunity...

to infuse this system with some high-level college talent.

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 11:43 AM EST up reply actions

Which is why we should

let Kubel walk and get another pick in the mix

by That'sWhatSheSaid on Dec 16, 2011 1:14 PM EST up reply actions

And sign Lee

"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

by cmathewson on Dec 16, 2011 3:14 PM EST up reply actions

New CBA

What’s the deal with the draft cap? I’ve read that it doesn’t matter how many picks you actually have. Will the Twins even be able to sign that many picks?

by archie2227 on Dec 16, 2011 11:54 AM EST up reply actions

hopefully...

Twins’ draft cap should be around $11M I’d guess (range of $4.5M to $11.5M I believe throughout the draft based on draft slot).

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 11:56 AM EST up reply actions

Yes

They will sign those guys.

"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

by cmathewson on Dec 16, 2011 11:57 AM EST up reply actions

especially if they focus on college guys..

there’s a lot less incentive for HS guys to enter the draft now (stupid MLB) but the college guys have much less of a real choice.

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 12:02 PM EST up reply actions

It does figure in draft position

The Twins get one of the higher numbers because they have the #2 pick.

by DJL44 on Dec 16, 2011 12:47 PM EST up reply actions

yep, like i said...

should be around $11M as a pool for the Twins I’d think.

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 1:19 PM EST up reply actions

2004

Hopefully the Twins’ front office can avoid another stinker of a draft this time around.

by markos on Dec 16, 2011 11:52 AM EST up reply actions

And since none of those are prime numbers they're destined to be good.

"Baseball, it is said, is only a game. True. And the Grand Canyon is only a hole in Arizona." ~George F. Will

by SooFoo Fan on Dec 17, 2011 2:00 PM EST up reply actions

Okay, 2 is... but 5/6 not bad...

"Baseball, it is said, is only a game. True. And the Grand Canyon is only a hole in Arizona." ~George F. Will

by SooFoo Fan on Dec 17, 2011 2:05 PM EST up reply actions

43

"Don't take life for granted, because tomorrow isn't promised to any one of us." -Kirby Puckett
"Tell Gardy there's nobody around to protect him now." Ozzie Guillen

by less cowbell, more 'neau on Dec 17, 2011 2:50 PM EST up reply actions

2/3, then...

"Baseball, it is said, is only a game. True. And the Grand Canyon is only a hole in Arizona." ~George F. Will

by SooFoo Fan on Dec 17, 2011 3:14 PM EST up reply actions

This thread made me laugh

by ColossusOfRhode on Dec 17, 2011 6:39 PM EST up reply actions

That post had a prime number of words

This one did not.

by spanspanspan on Dec 17, 2011 11:59 PM EST up reply actions

Souhan

Has Souhan blamed Slowey for Cuddyer’s departure yet?

by markos on Dec 16, 2011 11:50 AM EST reply actions

Souhan:

“the greatest person in the history of the planet left the Twins because Slowey slept with his wife and he got sick of Mauer being a panzy all day in the clubhouse.”

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 11:53 AM EST up reply actions

seriously, if there's one guy on the planet that I could take behind a shed and beat to a pulp...

it might be Souhan.

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 11:55 AM EST up reply actions

You have issues dude

by .mnqwerd on Dec 16, 2011 1:13 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs

Um

I would help DJSkillz hold down Souhan while he beats him up.

I'm a proud fan of the Minnesota Twins and Dallas Cowboys!
"Life is precious and time is a key element. Let’s make every moment count and help those who have a greater need than our own." – Harmon Killebrew
I would like to see Dallas vs the Giants on Thanksgiving, Make it happen NFL!

Check out my eBay items.

by Jessy S on Dec 16, 2011 2:49 PM EST up reply actions

I'm calling the cops.

by archie2227 on Dec 16, 2011 2:54 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs

You may have issues as well, dude.

"Don't take life for granted, because tomorrow isn't promised to any one of us." -Kirby Puckett
"Tell Gardy there's nobody around to protect him now." Ozzie Guillen

by less cowbell, more 'neau on Dec 16, 2011 10:03 PM EST up reply actions

I was going to say...

“Hey, you’re black.

http://padontstandforpaloalto.files.wordpress.com/2009/11/776441_black_kettle_1.jpg

"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

by cmathewson on Dec 17, 2011 12:14 AM EST up reply actions

Sheise

Still didn’t work

"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

by cmathewson on Dec 17, 2011 12:15 AM EST up reply actions

Regardless of SOuhan

Slowey still sucks

by That'sWhatSheSaid on Dec 16, 2011 1:15 PM EST up reply actions

umm, no.

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 1:19 PM EST up reply actions

ummm yes

I can do that too

by That'sWhatSheSaid on Dec 16, 2011 3:46 PM EST up reply actions

if you want to believe a guy like souhan, well...

more power to you.

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 4:48 PM EST up reply actions

i believe my own eyes

you believe what you wish to happen

by That'sWhatSheSaid on Dec 16, 2011 4:56 PM EST up reply actions

Souhan = Everything is Mauer's fault.

Souhan stuck in traffic: “Goddamn Baby Jesus probably caused an accident up ahead. Christ, we are paying him 100 million for this?”

Souhan in line at the DMV: “Maybe if Mauer wasn’t such a greedy bastard living in Florida he’d pay more taxes in Minnesota and we could afford another employee here to help ignore us.”

Souhan at the Vikings game: “Jebus, the Vikings suck. Maybe if Saint Joe had taken that scholarship to Florida State to play football instead of choosing baseball, he might have made it to the NFL and been drafted by the Packers to play the panzy for them, leaving Aaron Rogers to get picked up by the Vikes in stead. Way to go, Mauer.”

by Flip27 on Dec 16, 2011 2:52 PM EST up reply actions

Good stuff

Throw in a few horrible metaphors:

“Mauer hits like Lee Travino after a thunderstorm”

“Mauer’s about as interesting as a Lutefisk sandwich on Wonder bread”

“Mauer’s as lazy as the Maytag Repair Man.”

“Mauer hasn’t had a girlfriend since cell phones looked like Cornish game hens.” (An actual quote)

"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

by cmathewson on Dec 16, 2011 3:19 PM EST up reply actions

You have to wonder about his editor

How do you not ask in what way cell phones ever looked like Cornish game hens?

by amiller92 on Dec 16, 2011 3:45 PM EST up reply actions

None of those is a metaphor

by Caleb A on Dec 16, 2011 4:08 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs

Pedantry rec

by archie2227 on Dec 16, 2011 4:29 PM EST up reply actions

seriously...

how he still has a job is beyond me. not only should he be fired, but his editor should as well.

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 4:50 PM EST up reply actions

Needs this guy:

by amiller92 on Dec 16, 2011 5:41 PM EST up reply actions

well done sir...

best TV show ever.

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 8:36 PM EST up reply actions

Great show

He was also on “Homicide” right? Liked that one as well.

by Alexi Casilla All-Star on Dec 18, 2011 9:35 PM EST up reply actions

Also, 3/$31.5 for Cuddy...

makes the Willingham move even better. Only the most blatant Cuddy homers would argue keeping him was a better move at this point.

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 12:04 PM EST reply actions

Not even I can raise my hand for that

And now I have this outdated jersey… road trip to Denver, anyone?

by ColossusOfRhode on Dec 16, 2011 12:16 PM EST up reply actions

i'm in...

CO should be a fun team and Cuddy’s going to fit in great there. Good for him.

by DJSkillz on Dec 16, 2011 12:22 PM EST up reply actions

I have a #28 David Ortiz signed baseball

I think it’s worth more than some of his Red Sox stuff because it’s rare.

"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

by cmathewson on Dec 16, 2011 12:30 PM EST up reply actions

Given your whole Sandlot motif...

I think you should let your kids play with it in a lot adjacent to your cranky neighbor’s yard. Bonus if the cranky neighbor has a tall fence and a big slobbering dog.

by ColossusOfRhode on Dec 16, 2011 12:47 PM EST up reply actions

Well...

…If he has a ball signed by the ‘27 Yankees, I’d take that deal in a heartbeat

"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

by cmathewson on Dec 16, 2011 1:11 PM EST up reply actions

Ortiz jersey

I had the opportunity to buy one of his Twins jerseys for $200 at the Roseville Twins store before DO blew up in Boston. I didn’t have the foresight to guess what it would be worth, though, or the pull with my wife to fork over $200 for a giant jersey.

That's absurd!

by Devereaux on Dec 16, 2011 1:09 PM EST up reply actions

by Devereaux on Dec 16, 2011 1:12 PM EST up reply actions

Agreed

I think three years is too long for Cuddyer. $10.5M per year is alot, as well. Then add in the draft picks added by letting him walk and one just has to say good-by and good luck.

by Alexi Casilla All-Star on Dec 18, 2011 9:33 PM EST up reply actions