Why is it that the Twins Can't have Nice Things?

After today's latest loss to the Evil Empire, in the recap myjah asked the question "Why can't we have nice things?"  If Twinkietown were a musical, that would be the cue for someone to break into song, hence Twnzfan's rendition of "My Favorite Things."


Why is it that the Twins Can't Have Nice things?

Home runs from Justin

and also Cuddyer,

Lots more from Kubel

and Mauer on fire!

Jim Thome running

as if he had wings,

Why is it that the Twins can’t have nice things? 

Errorless fielding

from Lexi and Nishi,

None on the DL?  (Hey,

something seems fishy)

High-touted prospects

and World Series rings,

Why is it that the Twins can’t have nice things?

When the foes score

several times more,

When I’m feeling sad,

I try to remember to cheer for my team

although they still seem so bad!

Shutouts from Blackburn

and strikeouts from Frankie,

Wins for Pavano,

A new homer hanky,

Wisdom from Slowey

and scoreless innings,

Why is it that the Twins can’t have nice things?

High batting averages,

Low ERA’s,

Competent coaching

and more double plays,

Joe Nathan pitching while Mudcat Grant sings,

Why is it that the Twins can’t have nice things?

I miss those old days,

With their winning ways,

(Maybe I’m going mad)

I’ll look to the future

And hope for next year.

I miss my old Twins so bad!!!