If You Are Going To Target Field…

Also, try to schedule your bathroom breaks and trips to the concession stand for between innings. The people sitting behind you still trying to watch the game will thank you.

Or beach balls.

I wish I could rec this more than once.

The one thing I really hate is people who are mean or yell at fans from other teams. They are the most interesting people to talk to, I find.

Just venting to other Twins fans.

Nobody should be making up and spouting off that kind of garbage for an ugly girl.

I suppose he thought it was cooler than saying, “Gosh, I really don’t know!”

And turn left on 4th Street, right in front of “Dreamgirls.” There’s a lot a block away there few people use and it’s only $10.

Plus, after the game, while driving away, you get to witness parents trying to shield their children’s eyes from the Iffy District.

And if you wash them out REALLY WELL they are perfect beverage-smuggling containers no bag-check stadium security will ever forbid. (It helps to go to the game with female friends for this.)

And some people were standing in the front row in the 9th while Joe Nathan was in to get the save. People behind me were yelling and actually throwing things at the people standing up because they couldn’t see through them. It’s the 9th inning, people! Stand up!

I almost got into a fight at Rock the Garden a few years ago because the people behind me didn’t want to stand up to watch the headlining act. Raaaaaaaage.

I’ve gone to many Twins games at Comerica, including during the heated central division race in 2006. Tigers fans have never been rude to me. There may have been some mild trash talking and banter, but they weren’t rude or anything. In fact, of the many away stadiums I’ve seen the Twins play (and the number is in the double digits, although I’m too lazy to count), the only stadium that I’ve ever encountered truly rude fans is the old County Stadium in Milwaukee — and that was only once out of dozens of visits.

I guess they were kind of obnoxious in Yankee Stadium, but mostly they were surprised that Twins fans existed on the east coast.

Oakland wins for the nicest fans, FYI.

To start, I’ve seen the wave done at the Big House in Ann Arbor and at Camp Randall in Madison — they know how to do it right at Big Ten football games. It changes speed, changes direction, even splits in two — best of all, it waits for the TV timeouts. It’s something to see in a big bowl stadium where the crowd is symmetrically placed around the field.

However, I hate it at baseball stadiums.

For starters, baseball stadiums for the most part are not big bowls. The wave just doesn’t look cool skipping over chunks where the bleachers meet the field level seats and making odd turns. Plus, there are different tiers that have to try to coordinate simultaneously… it’s just not all that great and it’s poorly done.

So fine, it’s lame; normally I would just ignore it.

Except that I can’t.

You see, I like to watch every pitch. And there is nothing more annoying than trying to watch a game only to have everyone around you stand up and wave their arms in the air every ten seconds, blocking your view, for no good reason. The worst part is, they expect me to stand up and waves my arms too. If the wave looked cool, I might — might — be willing to let this go.

But honestly? Even if it was the coolest wave from the most coordinated crowd in Michigan Stadium, if it blocked my view of a pitch to Jim Thome going for homerun 600, I would be ticked off.

Tickets will be easy to come by next season.

I bring a backpack loaded with snacks and drinks when I bring my kids to the game. I still end up buying cotton candy or something because it is better than what is in the backpack in my kid’s eyes.