More Than You'll Ever Need to Know About Darin Mastroianni
Yesterday, the Twins claimed outfielder Darin Mastroianni off waivers from Toronto, designating relief pitcher Esmerling Vasquez for assignment to make room for him. You're probably saying to yourself, "Who is that?" If you're me, you're also probably saying, "Esmerling Vasquez? He was on the 40-man? I should've remembered that, since I write about the Twins in a light-hearted manner once a week." Here, then, is a little more about Darin Mastroianni, another piece of the puzzle that is the 2012 Minnesota Twins.
- He's 26.
- He has played in one major league game in his career, on August 24th of last year. He went 0-for-3.
- The only reason he played in that game was because Kelly Johnson forgot his passport.
- As noted by Rhett Bollinger at MLB.com, his best season in the minors was 2010, when he was the Double-A Eastern League leader in steals and hits.
- He has played for both the Lansing Lugnuts and the New Hampshire Fisher Cats, both of which are not made up. A good prank might be to assign him to the Waterloo Clog Dancers, just to see if he buys it. "Eff it, maybe that's their thing down there."
- He does not appear to be related to the great Italian film actor Marcello Mastroianni. Yes, he died before you were born, but he had a child with Catherine Deneuve and dated Faye Dunaway when that meant something, man.
- Is Aaron Gleeman nonplussed by the move? Yes. He gives it two "meh"s.
- Seth Stohs says/speaks that offensively, Mastroianni's high-end would be Ben Revere. His low-end is former Twins designated hitter Jason Tyner (never forget). Joe C. thinks Jason Repko is a good comparison, and says he is not expected to be on the Opening Day roster.
As per usual, if anything else happens in Twins Territory today, we'll check back in. Pick the move apart, complain about how bad The Office has gotten, talk about girls or do whatever it is you do in the comments.
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Haven't watched it since then.
So I wouldn’t know.
[#2 North Central] Minnesota RollerGirls (1-0) vs [#6 East] Montreal Roller Derby (0-0) - Sat 3/3/2012 in the Roy Wilkins Auditorium, St. Paul MN. mnrollergirls.com
I had high hopes for Robert California
But he doesn’t appear often enough. It’s definitely the dog of Thursday nights.
"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot
The Front Office
They should have ended it when Bill Smith left….
by twinscrazy_german on Feb 10, 2012 11:29 AM EST up reply actions
I gave up on it just after Kathy Bates came on the show for her little cameo.
Just plain bad at that point.
Girls are my favorite
"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot
Mine are dogs
Wait, we’re both talking about house pets right?
by twinscrazy_german on Feb 10, 2012 11:29 AM EST up reply actions
We could
I'm a proud fan of the Minnesota Twins and Dallas Cowboys!
"Life is precious and time is a key element. Let’s make every moment count and help those who have a greater need than our own." – Harmon Killebrew
I would like to see Dallas vs the Giants on Thanksgiving, Make it happen NFL!
Girls
As my father said, “there’s nothing better than a good one, and nothing worse than a bad one”. (although, I’ve found that bad ones can be fun for a minute…lol)
"live EVERY week like it's shark week" Tracy Jordan(30 Rock)
by carlpavanosmoustache on Feb 10, 2012 1:39 PM EST up reply actions
They're pretty good at roller derby.
Just saying.
[#2 North Central] Minnesota RollerGirls (1-0) vs [#6 East] Montreal Roller Derby (0-0) - Sat 3/3/2012 in the Roy Wilkins Auditorium, St. Paul MN. mnrollergirls.com
They're awesome
And I’m not just saying that because they took over a game thread and did unspeakable things to it once last year.
"Don't take life for granted, because tomorrow isn't promised to any one of us." -Kirby Puckett
"Tell Gardy there's nobody around to protect him now." Ozzie Guillen
by less cowbell, more 'neau on Feb 10, 2012 11:38 AM EST up reply actions
Well, SI.com gave us a preview of the Swimsuit issue today and has a pic of soccer star Alex Morgan in body paint.
Never watched the Office, so I can’t offer any insight onto that.
BRING BACK COMMUNITY DAMMIT!
Let loose the hogs of war!
Dogs of war..
Whatever farm animal of war, Lana...
I'm going crazy without Community!
Parks and Rec helps, but man I’m missing that show. NBC has “Britta it” lately with all it’s shows!
"I couldn't do that. Could you do that? Why can they do it? Who are those guys?"
by maxisagod on Feb 10, 2012 12:27 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
Jim and Pam aren't fun anymore.
Jim and Dwight aren’t funny anymore.
Dwight looks really old.
Andy’s character isn’t deep enough, likeable enough, or developed enough to hold down one of the two or three biggest spots on the show.
James Spader was a fun addition, but again – overuse.
What, exactly, is happening in the show overall? Where is the direction?
I always said that Kelly Kapoor should have been the new boss.
Think about how hilarious it would have been to see Kelly lead meetings talking about how designer knock-off hand bags are trashy and that they really should make another Bridget Jones movie… Everyone would be so annoyed all the time. It would be great! Plus, then Ryan could be all evil again (manipulating Kelly) and that would be fun, too.
But the show doesn’t need to be as much about the boss all the time anyway.
[#2 North Central] Minnesota RollerGirls (1-0) vs [#6 East] Montreal Roller Derby (0-0) - Sat 3/3/2012 in the Roy Wilkins Auditorium, St. Paul MN. mnrollergirls.com
Kaling is working on her own pilot
She’s supposed to be one of the writers. That’s a big part of the problem with the show… I think the people behind the scenes are just phoning it in. That and the show has run its course.
Office comedies are fun, but they’d be better off with a complete new cast
I liked the BBC series much better.
I won’t spoil it for anyone else, but it had a 2-year run and wrapped things up very nicely. I really don’t care that much about any of the characters on the US version anymore. The new romantic entanglements I don’t care about and Jim and Dwight have lost their edge.
"Don't take life for granted, because tomorrow isn't promised to any one of us." -Kirby Puckett
"Tell Gardy there's nobody around to protect him now." Ozzie Guillen
by less cowbell, more 'neau on Feb 10, 2012 11:36 AM EST up reply actions
Hipster.
Am I the only one who feels like people who say “Well, the British Office was better.” are the same people who always have to talk about about movies not being as good as the books they are based on?
[#2 North Central] Minnesota RollerGirls (1-0) vs [#6 East] Montreal Roller Derby (0-0) - Sat 3/3/2012 in the Roy Wilkins Auditorium, St. Paul MN. mnrollergirls.com
by Flip27 on Feb 10, 2012 12:01 PM EST up reply actions 1 recs
Well
that’s because the books are better than the movies. Every time. (yeah, yeah absolute statements are always wrong)
I don't like comparing books and movies - they are too different
Sure, a lot of times you are disappointed, because you imagined things to look different or this or that got left out. If movies were direct translations of books, the Lord of the Rings wouldn’t take 9 hours but 3 days to watch.
I agree that a lot of movies don’t live up to their book counterparts, but a lot of that has to do with expectations.
The Star Wars or StarTrek books probably are worse than the movies too.
by twinscrazy_german on Feb 10, 2012 12:47 PM EST up reply actions
Yeah,
I pretty much agree with this. I was being half serious with my first statement.
Oh, sweet irony.
(yeah, yeah absolute statements are always wrong)
“You know what I liked about the movie? No reading! Only took two hours. Aftwards I took a nap.” -Jim Gaffigan
[#2 North Central] Minnesota RollerGirls (1-0) vs [#6 East] Montreal Roller Derby (0-0) - Sat 3/3/2012 in the Roy Wilkins Auditorium, St. Paul MN. mnrollergirls.com
OR
Maybe it actually IS better
Just because you are not aware of something does not make it bad. If you disagree thats one thing, but to try and derisively label "hipster: on an opinion is just lame.
Or is “derisive” to hip for you too?
by clutterheart on Feb 10, 2012 12:50 PM EST up reply actions 2 recs
This one
If I would have thought the US The Office was better, I would have said so.
"Don't take life for granted, because tomorrow isn't promised to any one of us." -Kirby Puckett
"Tell Gardy there's nobody around to protect him now." Ozzie Guillen
by less cowbell, more 'neau on Feb 10, 2012 4:18 PM EST up reply actions
In Most Cases
The books are better. I say this because I view reading a good novel as making a movie in my head. My casting is better, and the special effects? Much better and less costly. Also, what exactly defines “hipster” these days? I mean, I listen to a lot off obscure music, eat a primarily organic, vegetarian diet, and I “get” Brit humor. Yet, My kids, and my wife, will tell you I am definitely not “hip”
"live EVERY week like it's shark week" Tracy Jordan(30 Rock)
by carlpavanosmoustache on Feb 10, 2012 4:25 PM EST up reply actions 2 recs
Well
You are hip with us and that is good enough. I am pretty sure everybody else would agree and that is fine enough for me.
I'm a proud fan of the Minnesota Twins and Dallas Cowboys!
"Life is precious and time is a key element. Let’s make every moment count and help those who have a greater need than our own." – Harmon Killebrew
I would like to see Dallas vs the Giants on Thanksgiving, Make it happen NFL!
I still enjoy the show
But yeah, it’s not quite as good now. Jim & Pam are probably the biggest disappointment – is there an example, ever, of a television character that wasn’t made worse by having kids? Dwight’s still usually interesting, but his interactions with Jim aren’t the same.
Andy was the logical choice as the new manager – he’s who a real-life company actually would’ve hired, given the candidates on the show – but someone more flawed would’ve been more fun. Andy’s just a generally decent, reasonably smart guy whose “weakness” is that he’s just socially awkward, and there’s not a whole lot they can do with the character in that role. Maybe they need him to have to fire someone, enjoy the power trip, and become a bit of a villain.
"There are only two things that are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former." - Albert Einstein
Natural progress of sitcom romance.
You either string it on too long, or you move to a less interesting phase (marriage, kids). It’s fun re watching the 1st 2 season of the office, and seeing how much things have changed between Jim and Pam, and how you can’t keep that up over 7 seasons.
On another note, has anyone been watching the Misfits on Hulu? That’s how you wrap up a romance! Awesome show!
"I couldn't do that. Could you do that? Why can they do it? Who are those guys?"
Mastoianni has higher upside than Revere offensively
His walk rates will translate better in the majors. I think Revere’s upside is a fast Jason Tyner, who had good contact skills, no power, and rarely walked.
Mastroianni walks a lot, has a little bit better pop, but doesn’t put the ball in play as often as Revere. Mastro is actually a better base stealer, both by SB totals (200-154) and SB/CS rates (74%-66%).
"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot
I still hope
Revere could develop some gap power as he gets old. He is still very young.
by clutterheart on Feb 10, 2012 1:23 PM EST up reply actions
He needs to either develop gap power or walk more
Of the two, walks are more likely, given his stature.
"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot
Like I always say re: Hicks...
OBP skills without the bat to back it up disappear up the food chain. In Mastroianni’s defense, he’s maintained them clear through AAA, but still, who throws him ball four in MLB?
I found a few things that say DM’s outfield arm is quite nice, so +1 v. Revere there.
by tobynotjason on Feb 10, 2012 4:01 PM EST up reply actions
You need to be a good hitter to have OBP skills
Exhibit A: Drew Butera. He will take every pitch he can possibly take. But they just keep throwing it down the middle until he sticks his bat out at is and hits his customary shallow fly ball to the left fielder.
"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot
And Mastroianni
Has been a good hitter. But maybe he has been fortunate to bat ahead of Drew Butera’s kid brother while on the way up.
I'm a proud fan of the Minnesota Twins and Dallas Cowboys!
"Life is precious and time is a key element. Let’s make every moment count and help those who have a greater need than our own." – Harmon Killebrew
I would like to see Dallas vs the Giants on Thanksgiving, Make it happen NFL!
Not in the low minors you don't.
Hicks hit .223 as a LHB last year. That’s horrible, period. He has yet to be a “good hitter” from the left side.
But he still OBP’d .353, which is rather tasty, esp. for Ft. Myers. That’s PURE OBP skill, and it’s unlikely to last at higher levels unless the hit tool comes around. I can’t help it – it’s just how minor league skills tend to translate.
by tobynotjason on Feb 14, 2012 2:28 PM EST up reply actions
Agree with that
Mastroianni is actually a pretty interesting pickup. 2011 was an off year but he was also moved up and down by Toronto the whole year – a cheap option that I thin is going to add real value to the twins. He can run-field throw line drive hitter with a great OBA. Plays OF and 2B – what is there not to like as a solid bench option or even a possible starter?
Say Plouffe struggles in the outfield....
….I could see Mastroianni as a platoon player with Revere.
"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot
In totally expected news..
Rich Harden will miss the 2012 season due to surgery.
Let loose the hogs of war!
Dogs of war..
Whatever farm animal of war, Lana...
Glad we didn't listen to everyone on this site calling for us to sign him
"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot
Why?
A signing would mean he passed a physical. (insert Twins’ medical staff zing)
by archie2227 on Feb 10, 2012 1:35 PM EST up reply actions 3 recs
As for TV
If you get Netflix, check out “Lilyhammer” Steven Van Zandt from The Sopranos new seies… very funny.
"live EVERY week like it's shark week" Tracy Jordan(30 Rock)
by carlpavanosmoustache on Feb 10, 2012 1:41 PM EST reply actions
Funny how Little Steven is now better known as "Silvio"
And Max Weinberg is better known for Late Night with Conan O’Brien, than for all their work on Bruce Spingsteen and the E Street Band.
"Don't take life for granted, because tomorrow isn't promised to any one of us." -Kirby Puckett
"Tell Gardy there's nobody around to protect him now." Ozzie Guillen
by less cowbell, more 'neau on Feb 10, 2012 2:11 PM EST up reply actions
Funny haha?
or funny sad and strange. I choose the latter as a lifelong Bruce fan. I have my tickets for April 24th at the HP Pavilion. Can’t wait, but it won’t be the same without Clarence.
"live EVERY week like it's shark week" Tracy Jordan(30 Rock)
by carlpavanosmoustache on Feb 10, 2012 4:13 PM EST up reply actions
You know what else I miss
That barefooted drummer that replaced Max on Late Night whenever Max was touring with Bruce and the boys.
I'm a proud fan of the Minnesota Twins and Dallas Cowboys!
"Life is precious and time is a key element. Let’s make every moment count and help those who have a greater need than our own." – Harmon Killebrew
I would like to see Dallas vs the Giants on Thanksgiving, Make it happen NFL!
For some reason I can't get "Recent Posts" on the sidebar
The most recent post I see is the Pizza Ranch one.
Same here
I’ve been having that problem all day long on more than just the twins site. I wonder what this could be?
by holsteinhill on Feb 10, 2012 5:16 PM EST up reply actions
had that problem the past couple of days
but it cleared itself up today.
I don't know, but I've been told it's hard to run with the weight of gold,
'the other hand, I've heard it said, it's just as hard with the weight of lead.
by montanatwinsfan on Feb 10, 2012 5:31 PM EST up reply actions
Devalue SBNation's tech guys
just like you devalue North Dakota. I see where this is going.
I'm a proud fan of the Minnesota Twins and Dallas Cowboys!
"Life is precious and time is a key element. Let’s make every moment count and help those who have a greater need than our own." – Harmon Killebrew
I would like to see Dallas vs the Giants on Thanksgiving, Make it happen NFL!
Jason Repko replacement
Can play all 3 OF positions, pinch run. Not a bad guy to have coming off the bench. Gives Benson and Tosoni more time in AAA.
And a new buddy for Gardy
Just like Nick Punto and Drew Butera.
I'm a proud fan of the Minnesota Twins and Dallas Cowboys!
"Life is precious and time is a key element. Let’s make every moment count and help those who have a greater need than our own." – Harmon Killebrew
I would like to see Dallas vs the Giants on Thanksgiving, Make it happen NFL!
curious about Seth's comments
given that Revere’s ceiling is pretty much Jason Tyner at this point…
by diehardtwinsfan on Feb 12, 2012 5:05 PM EST reply actions
Forget Jason Tyner
Revere is the outfield version of Drew Butera.
I'm a proud fan of the Minnesota Twins and Dallas Cowboys!
"Life is precious and time is a key element. Let’s make every moment count and help those who have a greater need than our own." – Harmon Killebrew
I would like to see Dallas vs the Giants on Thanksgiving, Make it happen NFL!
Yeah, except people actually like Revere
I don’t know of anyone whose ever said/thought “Gosh! Drew Butera is fun to watch!”
"Baseball, it is said, is only a game. True. And the Grand Canyon is only a hole in Arizona." ~George F. Will
Drew Butera is fun to watch...
when he’s dancing… http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iw3E3UzviAc&feature=youtu.be
"The problem with baseball is that it is not played year round" -Gaylord Perry
by twinsgirl197 on Feb 12, 2012 8:05 PM EST up reply actions
I hope the Twins find a way to keep Son of Sal around
Not necessarely as a player, but there is always positions in the PR department for communications majors…
by twinscrazy_german on Feb 13, 2012 5:45 AM EST up reply actions
didn't know he was a communication major, but I did find this when I looked it up.... I'm laughing now...
On Butera: One of the elite catchers in the nation … preseason All-America candidate behind the dish … possesses one the strongest arms and quickest releases in collegiate baseball … solid batter who continued to get better and better with the bat
(source: http://www.ucfathletics.com/sports/m-basebl/mtt/butera_drew00.html)
about that batting part….
"The problem with baseball is that it is not played year round" -Gaylord Perry
by twinsgirl197 on Feb 13, 2012 8:08 AM EST up reply actions
Revere is a much better hitter than Butera
Not even close. But I agree that Revere is about Tyner right now. Some think he will develop power. Some think he will walk more. It’s possible, but not likely.
"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot
It is likely he will get better
24 year old baseball players are likely to get better.
Yes
I sure hope he does. But I’m not optimistic given his size and the fact that he has regressed as he’s climbed the ladder. We’re talking about a player who has not had an OPS above .800 since low A ball. This might be his ceiling, in which case, we can expect further regression as pitchers find and exploit his holes.
"You're thinking too much. Just have fun." -- Bennie "The Jet" Rodriguez in Sandlot

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