Breakfast and Baseball: Optimism Falls, Brian Stow, Hidden Ball Tricks, and the Inhuman

The Twins started the season 0-4, and we can see that quite a few people jumped off the preseason bandwagon immediately.

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This after 2.5% of the season. Wanna know what equals 2.5% of an NFL season? Getting past the halfway mark of the 2nd quarter of your team's first game, but that's okay. Your lack of faith means more leg room for me in the stands come August.

  • When Robert Andino joined the Baltimore Orioles, he was probably on top of the world. I'm not sure why, but he must have had some fond memories after his first season as an O. However, years of losing have taken their toll on him, as his boyish grin has been replaced by the stoniest of stone-faces. Robert, keep your chin up. The sun will come out tomorrow... and by tomorrow, I mean a time where it's possible for Dom Cobb to perform inception on John Henry and the Steinbrenners, convincing all parties involved that it would be best to dissolve the Yankees and Red Sox franchises. In other words, never.
  • I don't know about you, but I have been paying close attention to the news involving Brian Stow, the Giants fan that was brutally attacked at Dodger Stadium last year. Stow has been slowly recovering and it sounds like he was invited to be at the Giants home opener yesterday to take part in the first pitch, but did not attend, likely due to his health. Instead, his 13-year old son was there in his place, but Stow still made an appearance. I'll admit that I got a little misty-eyed when Stow wished his son good luck with the first pitch.
  • Hidden-ball tricks always seem to be the stuff of legends, but the Philadelphia Phillies pulled it off against the New York Mets in their match-up yesterday. R.A. Dickey was attempting to sacrifice bunt catcher Josh Thole over to 2nd base and did so successfully. That is, until the Phillies decided to tell Thole that Dickey bunted the ball foul, which is when the real fun begins. Thole starts meandering back to 1st base, which then the Phillies chase him back and eventually tag him out. Here's a clue that your hidden-ball trick worked: Obviously if you fool the hitter, but like a good play-action in football, it worked like a charm if even the person working the camera doesn't even know the whereabouts of the ball. The kicker is that Jim Thome started this tomfoolery. Too bad it cost him three vertebrae.
  • The Cleveland Indians agreed to sign OF/DH Johnny Damon to a one-year deal earlier this week. Damon will start the season in the minor leagues, and then his one-year contract will officially kick in when he's called up to the majors. I wonder if righthanded hitters are deliberately avoiding the Indians or vice-versa, because the most dangerous righty in their lineup is Shelley effing Duncan.
  • Finally, you decide which of these is the worst to see. Is it the Texas Rangers fan that has the invisible Conan O'Brien strings attached to her lips, or is it the creepy crawly fire ants that actually caused a college baseball game to be suspended? My vote: The woman, because the human face should not be capable of performing that kind of trick. Then again, my eyes shouldn't be able to do this, either.

For those of you that remember, I work at Target Field as an usher during the season. Today is my first game I'll be working this season. If you happen to be at the game, I can be found in Section 238 below the smaller scoreboard in right field. Let's see the Twins give Yu a rude welcome to Minnesota.

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