The Minnesota Twins Are Like a Beer
This is going to be dumb.
Satire, Irreverence, & Other Humor
Excerpts from Tom Brunansky's Diary
The Twins have a new hitting coach, but they're still second-to-last in the league in homers. Let's go inside Bruno's diary to find out how he's coping with the dinger-less present.
Arcia's Hot Streak Troubling Twins Fans
Longtime Minnesota fans bracing themselves for the other shoe to fall.
The Twins pitching staff discusses Clay Buchholz
(NOTE: Satire.) In this episode, the Twins pitching staff gathers on the team plane to discuss the accusations that Clay Buchholz is doctoring the baseball.
Source: Kevin Correia on his way to beat you up
According to sources, Kevin Correia is tired of your lip, and is going to show up at your house and beat the ever-loving snot out of you.
A.J. Pierzynski Shares His "Must Bother" MSP Sites
In a Twinkie Town EXCLUSIVE, A.J. Pierzynski writes about what he most looks forward to bothering when he comes back to the Twin Cities.
How to backtrack: A guide for Twins fans
You, Twins fan, have likely ridiculed the team this offseason, but here we are three weeks into the season, and they're not that bad. Want to backpedal a little? Here's how.
Fanpost
Where's Oswaldo?
Where's Waldo? No friends: Where's OSwaldo?
Other Reasons the Twins hope to cancel games
We've already had a game snowed out. What else could go wrong?
Twins Announce $15 "All You Can Yell" Promotion
For the same amount of money you would have spent to watch batting practice, you now can scream at Ron Gardenhire about pretty much anything.
My nine-year-old self reviews the 2013 Twins
Maybe we should lighten up on this year's edition of the Twins. After all, my nine-year-old self would be absolutely thrilled to be here.
The Twins 2013 Season In Review
Why wait to review the 2013 season? It's a new year at Target Field, so let's take a look back at the 2013 season. Yes, before it's even played.
Twins Hope to Sway Media with Food, Poison
A sneak preview of the new food and drink options at Target Field for media members and bloggers took a turn for the bizarre on Thursday.
The Search for the Twins' 5th Starter
Opening Day is two weeks away. The Twins haven't settled on a fifth starter. Who will it be. Twinkie Town has some dark horse possibilities. You will need to be open to the possibility of time travel and a bra that can pitch.
Advice for a Twin, on having twins, from a twin
Warning: non-baseball content, unless you consider Joe Mauer's future as a parent to be baseball-related.
Can Mauer Babies Save Vikings Stadium Effort?
Facing a shortfall in the gambling income that was supposed to pay for the state's share of the new Vikings stadium, Minnesota officials are placing their own bet on the best way to make up the gap: the Mauer twins.
JOE MAUER DISS TRACK: "BEING POLITE IS IMPORTANT"
Taking a page from Trevor Bauer, Minnesota's MVP catcher and 3-time batting champ has recorded a diss rap to address all the haters. We share the lyrics with you now.
VEGAS: Who Gets Hurt Next and How?
What is Las Vegas saying about the next weird/hilarious injury that will befall a current or former Minnesota athlete? Will Emmet Otter's Jug Band Christmas be involved?
Top 10 Guesses How Swarzak Fractured Two Ribs
Apparently it was due to "horseplay". How much of that story do you believe?
A Preview of Spring Training News
We'd like to get the jump on publishing news from Spring Training next week, so here's our look at what we're expecting for top stories. (Warning: maybe not.)
YOU'VE JUST SIGNED DELMON YOUNG. WHAT NOW?
Twinkie Town has acquired the cover letter on the instruction manual teams receive when they sign or trade for Delmon Young. We share it with you here.
A Twins Offseason Quiz
We want to make sure you're paying attention this winter. This quiz will be graded, but it will not count against your final grade (or make any sense whatsoever).
SPONSORED CONTENT: Denard Span's CONSPIRACY!
FSN North is proud to announce a new show starring former Twin Denard Span and his ongoing search for the truth, no matter where it takes him.
If Twins Signed Kyle Lohse: Gardy, Not Impressed
Let's imagine, if you will, what would take place if the Twins actually did sign Kyle Lohse.
Scenes From An Offseason, Volume 7
In this edition of Scenes From An Offseason, the Twins head out for the 53rd annual Twins Winter Caravan - and hijinks ensue.
Best Supporting Actor: Jack Morris?
This is the first acting nomination for the legendary MLB hurler and hero of the 1991 World Series.
