Nothing feels better than telling all of your friends your most personal secrets via your Facebook status. How else would they efficiently stalk you?
Joe Crede called his mom because he took a walk tonight!
Delmon Young likes hittin' XBH's...
Francisco Liriano strikes you out, bitch!
Orlando Cabrera is ridin' dirty!
Nick Punto went 4 4 4!
In not getting on base?
Joe Nathan wants to pitch agains the Royals ALL THE TIME!
Ron Gardenhire thinks it's about time my boys win!
Jason Kubel is wondering if he could be a dark horse for Twins offensive MVP?
Justin Morneau doesn't know the difference between Canadian bacon & ham!!!???
Jesse Crain is glad he didn't pitch tonight.
Jeff Manship OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG i think i peed myself
Carlos Gomez go zoom, no crash!
Joe Mauer thinks his sideburns get sexier every day. NO DOUBT.
Matt Guerrier is working on cloning himself. Please knock b4 entering basement.