The Curse

"It breaks your heart. It is designed to break your heart. The game begins in the spring, when everything else begins again, and it blossoms in the summer, filling the afternoons and evenings, and then as soon as the chill rains come, it stops and leaves you to face the fall alone. You count on it, rely on it to buffer the passage of time, to keep the memory of sunshine and high skies alive, and then just when the days are all twilight, when you need it most, it stops"

Former commissioner of baseball, and father of Oscar nominated actor, Paul Giamatti, A. Bartlett Giamatti wrote those words.

I think as Twins fans, we need it more now than ever. No other fans can say that they need it more. It's been 19 years since the Twins have been to the World Series. After last night's defeat, I went on a fact finding mission, to to find out why the Twins can't beat the Bronx Bombers. It seems to me that the Twins aren't snakebitten, like so many broadcasters and sportswriters would have you believe. I think that they are cursed. It may seem unusual, but when it comes to baseball, I don't believe in good clutch hitters, RBIs, or even magical switches that you can turn on in the post season.

But all good curses have an origin. The Curse of The Bambino, The Curse of The Bill Goat, The Curse of The Black Sox. And not all curses are this specific. The Twins can't beat the Yankees. They've had one winning year against them since 1997. That was in 2001.

And not all curses are this specific. What is the cause of this curse. A curse is the only legitimate cause. Twins take the lead, then the lead is squandered, and runs are impossible to come by. Off center throws, booted balls, everything. What is the issue?

Why have the Twins had only one winning season against the Yankees since 2001, and before that, 1992 was the last winning season against the Yankees.

I now know the origin of this curse.

Chuck Knoblauch. This is the curse of Chuck Knoblauch.

In 1991 Knoblauch won Rookie of The Year, and in 1992, Knoblauch was preventing a Sophmore Slump, and in 1993 Knoblauch was frustrated and wanted to leave Minnesota. He got his way in 1998, and was traded to the Yankees.

The Twins saw Knoblauch at second base whenever they played New York. During all those embarrassing losses. The David Wells perfect game. Which was in 1998, Knoblauch's first year in the Bronx.

Now, why did the Twins have a winning year against the Yankees in 2001? It was Knoblauch's last year in pinstripes.

Now, how do the Twins fix it? They need to buy Chuck Knoblauch a plane ticket and give him a good seat to tonight's game. And he needs to be wearing a number 11 Knoblauch Twins jersey.

It's the only logical solution.