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Twinhua News Agency: "Defending Champs Looking To Repeat in 2012"

We received the following statement from the Official Minnesota Twins News Agency - better known by its shorter name, Twinhua. It actually explains a lot.


2010 AL Central Champions Looking To Repeat In 2012

MINNEAPOLIS - With the pennant from the 2010 division championship now flying proudly above Target Field, the Twins are making every move to reassemble that beloved team for a run at a repeat championship in 2012.

Said general manager Terry Ryan, "2010 was one of the most dominating performances by any team in the history of the AL Central, and if we can bring all of those players back, there's no reason we can't have the same performance again next year." Closer Matt Capps, who dominated down the stretch after being acquired for little-used prospect Wilson Ramos, has already re-signed. The team continues to pursue outfielders Jason Kubel and Michael Cuddyer, in the hopes of keeping those important pieces in place.

Unfortunately, certain so-called "journalists" continue to spread lies about the existence of an unsanctioned 2011 season, in hopes of destabilizing the team. The Twinhua News Agency would like to remind fans that such rumors and untruths should not be trusted. The organization has always built, and will always build, winning teams. The "Twins Way" is sound and is not to be questioned. The Twins have played perfect defense and hit like a tornado of rabid wolverines, and any information to the contrary is a lie.

"We have built the perfect team," said Ryan. "Keeping this team together is the top priority for the organization. To look outside the organization for major new pieces would be foolish. If we added new players rather than keeping the old ones, it would be the same as saying that previous teams were not perfectly assembled by the Politburo- I mean, the front office. And since The Twins Way has always produced dominant teams, that is clearly not true."

The Twins begin spring training in February, as they attempt to win a record eighteenth consecutive AL Central title.