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(NOTE: Danny Valencia recently wrote a letter to Twins General Manager Terry Ryan. Twinkie Town is very fortunate to have acquired a copy. Please enjoy.)
Dear T-Bone,
'Sup, T? It's Danny V, just checking in from Da Rotch. Would've just sent U an email, but I can't get the wi-fi figured out here 4 the life of me. Prolly has something 2 do with the Canadian interchange rate. (EDITOR'S NOTE: Rochester is on the US side of Lake Ontario.)
Anyway, just chillaxin' here and figured I'd check in and see when I can come back 2 tha Minny Skinny. I saw that Trevor had a couple throwing errors the other day, so figured U may be looking 2 make a move, and wanted to let U know that I'm 5-by-5, brah. Much love 2 Trev, but I've been stroking it lately, 2, and U know it's like I always say: when in doubt, swagg out! :)
Besides, I'm thinkin' these Canadians (EDITOR'S NOTE: again, Rochester is in America) here don't quite pick up on what I'm throwing down. For 1, they all eat this thing called a garbage plate, which must be a multicultural thing, and I'm down with that, but it's just not 4 me. Language barrier, maybe? (EDITOR'S NOTE: no.) For another, it's a pretty small town (EDITOR'S NOTE: as of the 2010 Census, the Rochester area has a population of 1,055,278), and a young guy like me who wants 2 get out in the community has a hard time finding things 2 do (WINK WINK! J/K LOL).
So, what I guess I'm getting at is that I'm ready to pick it and stick it, broseph. Get at me when U get a minute, T. Maybe put a good word in with Gardy 4 me. God bless.
Swagger4Life,
DV