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Harmon Killebrew, Kirby Puckett, Rod Carew, Tony Oliva, Kent Hrbek and...Andrew Albers?
The Minnesota Twins announced on Thursday that the next statue to grace the Target Field plaza will be of Albers, the rookie who became the first Twins starting pitcher to reach the 9th inning in 2013. A ceremony and dedication will be held prior to Monday's game against Cleveland.
"Some might say that we're jumping the gun a bit," said Twins assistant GM Rob Anthony. "But when you have a guy take a shutout into the 9th inning of his first professional start? That's something you celebrate. We think most Twins fans will agree."
The ceremony for the Saskatchewan native will include speeches from Twins greats Tony Oliva, Tim Laudner and Roy Smalley, and the Medicine Hat Children's Choir will sing the national anthem, along with "O Canada!" and "No Sugar Tonight (New Mother Nature)" by Winnipeg's The Guess Who. 63 Canadian geese, in honor of Albers' number 63, will then be released into the Minneapolis night. It is expected to push the start time of the game back by 30-45 minutes, depending on the extent of the goose feces cleanup.
The time-sensitive nature of the project means that Albers' statue will not be of the time-consuming bronze variety like the other statues. "It's a rush job," conceded a front office source. "Dave St. Peter (Twins President and University of North Dakota alum) called in a favor and had a couple of UND students get to work on it. I guess it's made out of 'found objects,' so it'll have a nice, modern flair."
Twinkie Town spoke with one of the sculptors, Tanner Pavelich, 20, and the East Grand Forks native said that the objects are "Kodiak tins, some BLD (Busch Light Draft) returnables, and duct tape. His pitching arm is a Husqvarna chainsaw we painted black with some orange flames. It's pretty fuckin' tight, bro."
(NOTE FROM STU: in case you missed the tag above, and since there was some confusion on the internet after last week's piece, THIS IS NOT A THING THAT IS HAPPENING. Also, thank you to Mike Rand for the inspiration on this.)