For the seven of you still paying attention (and god bless you), last night was rock bottom for the season, right? Bartolo Colon smothered a punchless Twins lineup and the Twins defense did Drew Albers no favors as the Twins fell 11-0, their 14th shutout of the season.
Oakland opened the scoring with a massive Yoenis Cespedes solo dong in the 2nd. This was immediately followed by the Oswaldo Arcia Show, and not the cool offensive kind where he hits balls real hard. He lost a Derek Norris liner in the lights that allowed Norris to reach second and later score, then kicked around a Daric Barton single that resulted in Josh Reddick scoring and Barton on third base.
Staked to a 3-0 lead, Colon pounded the strike zone without fear of reprisal. The Twins had multiple scoring opportunities but were never able to break through, a familar refrain this season. Colon finished with 8 strikeouts in six scoreless innings; the Twins finished 0-for-8 with runners in scoring position.
Of course, even if they'd been able to get to Colon, Oakland's offense and their own defense may still have overcome any rally. The Athletics chased Albers in the 5th after a bases-loaded Ed Escobar throwing error allowed all three runners to score, making the score 7-0 and sending your author to bed. LaVelle had to watch the whole goddamn thing if you need more info than this. (You don't, unless you've never heard Gardy sound disgusted with his team's effort, which, after these three seasons, come on.)
The Twins committed four errors on the night and were basically terrible from top to bottom. Albers only gave up three earned runs, if you are compelled to want a silver lining of some sort. Otherwise, I award them no points, may god have mercy upon their souls, etc.
Robot Roll Call
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Enjoy your weekend, everybody.