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Tuesday Twins: She's dead, Jim.

We're over it.
We're over it.
Hannah Foslien

Good morning Twinkie Towners! Here are some uplifting links:

  • CBS News just declared the Twins season dead last week, which is rather optimistic if you ask me. Their prediction for next year? The Twins will be better, but still finish last.
  • Jordon Schafer attributes his hot-hitting start with the Twins to getting everyday at-bats, and says he would love to stay in Minnesota. "I love all of the guys here," Schafer said.
  • Kennys Vargas only needs to hit one more home run and David Ortiz will buy him a special necklace. Supposedly.
  • Apparently Elton John's road manager is a Twins fan, and Elton trashes him about it whenever the Twins are doing bad most of the time.