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Area Shanes React to Shane Robinson's Departure

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Most Shanes agree that he'll be missed as a Shane first, a Twin second.

Peter Llewellyn-USA TODAY Sports

Shane Robinson, who fulfilled the utility outfielder role for the 2015 Minnesota Twins, signed a minor-league deal with Cleveland on Thursday, leaving area Shanes saddened, but not surprised.

"Man, you just don't see that many Shanes anymore, you know," said Shane Gentry, 39, of Marshall.  "So when there was a Shane on my favorite baseball team, it was pretty cool."

With the logjam in the Twins outfield, even a versatile player like Robinson was going to struggle for playing time.

"I thought when they moved (Aaron) Hicks that Shane might stick around, but it sounds like they're moving (Miguel) Sano out there," said Gentry.  "You got (Max) Kepler and maybe even Ozzie (Arcia) waiting in the wings, there's just no room for Shane.  Which stinks, because that's my name, too."

Shane Nelson, a 34-year-old machinist in Big Lake, said it didn't used to be this way.

"Man, when I was a kid, the Twins had Shane Mack.  Shane Mack was awesome!   Shane Robinson wasn't Shane Mack, maybe not even Shane Rawley, but he was a perfectly creditable Shane.  Now, though?  Nothin'."

Gentry said he could see the Shanelessness coming.

"When we had a son, I tried to sell my wife on Shane, Jr.  She was not having it.  Ended up naming him Zachary after my uncle, who was a dick."

Shane Fostervold, 38, agreed that the Shane drought was unsurprising.

"I have a kid in preschool and a kid in first grade in the Lakeville district.  You wanna know how many Shanes are in their classes?  Zilch.  Two kids named Brooklyn and a half-dozen Carters and Wyatts, but God forbid there's a Shane in there.

"And the fuck's a Brayyden?  Christ."

Robinson could not be reached for comment.