I did this a few times back in 2011, the first in the Twins' current series of garbage fire baseball seasons. It's back, because holy cow, this team is bad. How bad? Let's take a look!

Winning Percentage
2015 Minnesota Twins: .143
1962 New York Mets: .250
1899 Cleveland Spiders: .130

Pythagorean Winning Percentage
2015 Minnesota Twins: .131
1899 Cleveland Spiders: .171

OPS+
2015 Minnesota Twins: 51
1899 Cleveland Spiders: 72
Nick Punto (career): 76

ERA+
2015 Minnesota Twins: 66
1899 Cleveland Spiders: 58
Hey, the Twins were better: Yes, but...
PJ Walters with Minnesota: 71
So, this whole staff is worse than PJ Walters: Yes

Players named "Crazy"
2015 Minnesota Twins: 0
1899 Cleveland Spiders: 1

Isolated Power
2015 Minnesota Twins: .074
Denny Hocking (career): .093

OPS
Torii Hunter: .290
Bert Blyleven (career): .290

Minnesota Twins opponents: .871
Kirby Puckett (career): .837

At-bats per Home Run
2015 Minnesota Twins: 114.5
Jim Kaat (career): 78.2

Home Runs
2015 Minnesota Twins: 2
Adrian Gonzalez: 5
Kendrys Morales: 2 (29 AB)
Kendrys Morales with Minnesota: 1 (154 AB)

Triples
2015 Minnesota Twins: 1
Sam Fuld: 2

Unintentional Walks
Joe Mauer: 4
Trevor Plouffe: 4
Everyone else on the 2015 Minnesota Twins, combined: 5

RBI
Oswaldo Arcia: 0
Bartolo Colon: 1

Minnesota Twins with a lower batting average than Bartolo Colon
Kurt Suzuki
Torii Hunter
Trevor Plouffe
Oswaldo Arcia
Eduardo Escobar
Shane Robinson

Bartolo Colon is 41 and fat and a pitcher: Yes

Save Opportunities
2015 Minnesota Twins: 0

Innings Pitched
Glen Perkins: 2
Every other Twins pitcher except Casey Fien: More than 2

WHIP
Blaine Boyer: 4.000
Drew Butera (career): 1.125

ERA
2015 Minnesota Twins: 6.52
Dan Gladden (career): 4.50