Welcome to this weeks episode of Bullpen on a Budget!
Today we try to tackle a very run down bullpen on the verge of the wrecking ball. With an owner that refuses to invest any money into fixing it's crumbling foundation, and a general manager that just patches the holes with duct tape, this Minnesota Twins bullpen is going to be a bit of a challenge.
But aside from making Fernando Abad the closer and bringing up young exciting talent like J.T. Chargois,
what can we do to spruce up this dilapidated fixer upper on a budget?
1. Inspirational posters that both inspire and instill fear into our relief pitchers. This includes posters of former Twins greats to help bring out the best in our players, as well as educational posters warning that a DFA is just a phone call away. I found this poster of some Twins legends for a reasonable $4.99 and this poster for $15 that should also do the job.
2. A nice comfortable sectional sofa would go a long way towards keeping our prized pitchers as relaxed as possible coming into high leverage and stressful situations. I found this very reasonable gem still available that should do the trick.
3. Now that our lovely Target Field trees are gone for good, let's bring some nature back and a little feng shui to the bullpen with some nice shrubberies and a little path down the middle. The extra oxygen they produce will keep the bullpen guys energized and ready. They can also eliminate time consuming trips to the bathroom and help to make sure our pitchers never have to worry about nature calling in the middle of the big game. Various shrubbery can be found here for under $30
4. For the final touch, this Twins Mystery box can be filled with exciting prizes for pitchers to open, but only when they do well. Fill it full of silly string or various seasons of the Bachelor on DVD and keep the bullpen wondering what's in the box for only $24.95.
All together this simple bullpen makeover will cost only $104.94 plus shipping and handling. A mere drop in the bucket compared to the guaranteed results it will achieve.
That's all for now.....see you next time on Bullpen on a Budget