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Twins 2, Orioles 0: ErWIN Santana

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It’s actually “Ervin” I was making a joke.

Minnesota Twins v Baltimore Orioles Photo by Greg Fiume/Getty Images

Tonight’s game was really fun to watch, but it was the type of game that I’m unsure how to make sound interesting. That type of game is a low scoring pitcher’s duel. I will get to say “dong” one more time in this recap, and there was indeed a walk that haunted. The recap tics are there, so we can all feel safe and comfortable in the Tawny-recap-zone.

Ervin Santana pitched even better than he normally pitches, going all 9 innings and allowing absolutely no runs. The shutout came with 6 strikeouts, 2 walks and only 2 hits (both singles.) The man has successfully transitioned from “Twins ace” to “HELL YEAH ACE.”

The Twins managed 2 runs on 6 hits, and this is how they managed them:

Jorge Polanco led off the 5th with a walk. Then, wait hold on. Hold on! Let me go spend an unwarranted amount of time on a shitty and obtrusive animated gif.

Okay thanks, I’m back. Anyway, Jason Castro singled him over to third, and then Byron Buxton came to the plate and whooops

Buxton delivered with a single of his own. 1-0 Twinkles.

In the 7th Brian Dozier would Dozier-Dong a ball over the left-field fence for his 6th of the year. That would be it for the scoring.

Ervin Santana nabbed his 7th win while bringing his ERA down to a nifty 1.80, while the Twins rise to 24-18 on the year.

Cue dancing gifs in the comments!

STUDS:
Ervin Santana, obvs
Brian Dozier: Dinger
Kennys Vargas: A nice big pair of doubles.

DUDS:
Twins Bullpen: Too lazy to even pitch one inning?!

SOME KIND OF ROLL CALL THING

# Commenter # Comments
1 Rahil Modi 32
2 TwinsDingers 28
3 Brandon Brooks 27
4 badcoffee 24
5 CG19 20
6 SooFoo Fan 12
7 less cowbell, more 'neau 11
8 Joel Hernandez 11
9 Cbrolin 8
10 montanatwinsfan 7
11 blackmankitteh 3
12 Will Ragatz 3
13 Pau from the sky-tinted water 2
14 TawnyFroggy 2
15 MNWildcat 2
16 Nick Rothe 1
17 ira ftw 1
18 gonzobob 1
19 mefoolonhill 1
20 kusko_andy 1
21 Hayden A 1
22 twinssdfan 1
23 Lestermilk 1
24 mg2724 1
25 kenzertz 1
26 Daniel Carlson 1
# Recs Commenter Comment Link
2 Joel Hernandez Have you tried turning it off and turning it back on
2 CG19 Insurance run
2 CG19 Getting swept by the Yankees was my childhood
1 Rahil Modi It was indeed
1 SooFoo Fan totally reads twinkletown
1 montanatwinsfan "This game is far from over."
1 SooFoo Fan Theres the homer someone was waiting for
1 TwinsDingers I was scroll up WOOOO!
1 Brandon Brooks Murder them all, Erv
1 Brandon Brooks Thankfully, I'm covered under the warranty.
1 Rahil Modi literally
1 TwinsDingers This one is a bit naughty
1 montanatwinsfan TWINS WIN!
1 badcoffee I'm still at work
1 TwinsDingers [no title]
1 Pau from the sky-tinted water Dozier with the long ball!
1 Joel Hernandez What a quick game
1 montanatwinsfan euphemismly
1 Rahil Modi Chris Davis and Joe Mauer are 2 of the only 4 players in the MLB without an errror
1 Hayden A GO TWINS GO
1 Brandon Brooks Phrasing, Brandon
1 Brandon Brooks Frequently.
1 less cowbell, more 'neau Have you tried throwing against the wall and cursing to the heavens?
1 Joel Hernandez my childhood involved a lot of fruit loops
1 Brandon Brooks First part took care of itself
1 Joel Hernandez it's his phone malfunctioning
1 Joel Hernandez Maybe they were selling girl scout cookies
1 Brandon Brooks Vargas has been getting his sprints in today
1 Rahil Modi Miguel Sano has an average exit velocity of 100 mph, leading the majors
1 less cowbell, more 'neau [no title]
1 TwinsDingers If it rains out with the same score, we will get a win!
1 Rahil Modi That could be a "Nigerian Prince" scam
1 CG19 He took a $1200 coat
1 blackmankitteh who was asking for a Dozier homer?

Everyone point out every mistake I made, Okay bye.