Miguel Sano was gone today, serving his one game suspension for not liking being grabbed in the face by a white guy, but the Twins didn’t need him to score a majillion-gajillion runs.
The Hector Santiago v.s Mike Pelfrey pitchers duel lasted until the 3rd when both pitchers lost the perfect game. Pelf lost his when Byron Buxton (more on this guy later) hit a double that ultimately resulted in absolutely nothing. Santiago however decided he wanted to give up some runs. After a walk and a single, some hipster drove in a run with a single, and later Jose Abreu did the same. That’s all the White Sox hits in the game until the 9th, by the way.
Enjoying the once dreaded Pelfrey’s second time through the order bonus, Jorge Polanco led off with a single. Max Kepler drove him in with one of his own and then stole second on what I assume was a 30 MPH curve or some shit. Notable “s” enthusiast Kennys Vargas came to the plate and hit a Sano-esque long dong to give the Twins the lead. Pelfrey got a few outs finally and then hit Jason Castro with a ball for good measure.
In the 6th, when Pelfrey had long since stopped being the pitcher who was currently pitching. With two Eds on base, Ehire Adrianza chopped them both in for his first Twins hit and also advanced to second on an error. We’ll make him an honorary Ed. Buxton singled him in, and advanced to second on another error. Joe Mauer then singled HIM in, but stayed at first because he’s lazy. To finish off the scoring, Jorge Polanco doubled him in, getting to second the legit way. Add that all up and you get 7-2 Twins.
Hector Santiago forgot how to pitch with one out left in the sixth, luckily Tyler Duffey was there and nabbed that last out, and then all three in the next inning for good measure. Taylor Rogers finished the game out, but gave up one whole hit. For shame, Taylor, for shame.
Byron Buxton: 3 for 4 with a two-bagger and zero strikeouts~
Kennys “The extra s is for extra dong and also I can’t spell” Vargas.
Legally required to list no duds TWINS WIN
TECHNOLOGICAL SINGULARITY INDUCING ROLLCALL
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In a surprising victory, it turns out you guys decided that no, no I should not have put a poll in that gamethread.