But enough about losing to Chicago, how about those fights?

Yes, yes, the Twins dropped another game to the dreadful White Sox, but did you see the fight on Thursday afternoon?

If, like me, you’re an occasional work-from-home type and like to keep a ballgame on as white noise, MLB Network had the Detroit Tigers/New York Yankees tilt. It was an essentially irrelevant game to the Twins, unless you’re invested in them taking over the first Wild Card slot from New York so they can lose in brutal fashion at Target Field.

Anyway, there were a couple close pitches in this game, and LaTroy Hawkins’ friend Tommy Kahnle threw one behind Miguel Cabrera’s rump. Kahnle got tossed, and that seemed to be the end of it.

HOWEVER!

After Kahnle got sent, Cabrera stepped back into the box and starting yakking with Yankees catcher Austin Romine. The yakking led to touching, and the touching led to shoves, and then there was no mystery left.

Although Miggy drew first blood, you have to give Romine the nod in this dust-up, as he executed the takedown and appeared to deliver a clean dickpunch immediately thereafter.

The best part of the brawl, as usual, was the bullpen guys LUMBERING across the outfield to yell “HEY, FUCK YOU MAN” at guys they probably played college ball with.

They should have had oxygen at second base.

What should have ended there didn’t, as the pitchers kept hitting batters, sometimes in the ding-dang head.

If Betances meant to do that, and I don’t think he did, he should be in space jail.

The entire point of this, as you probably guessed, was to provide an excuse to show Torii Hunter chucking a baseball back at a guy who hit him in 2002:

In conclusion, fights are dumb but are fun to watch when nobody gets hurt.