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Things you need to know about Bartolo Colon

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Yesterday’s FSN broadcast listed three amazing facts about Bartolo Colon. It only made me want to find out more.

Minnesota Twins v Toronto Blue Jays
God damn, you sexy human being.
Photo by Tom Szczerbowski/Getty Images

During yesterday’s broadcast of the Twins vs. White Sox game at Target Field, FSN displayed this amazing graphic about Bartolo Colon:

Those are all, 100% true facts.

Those amazing facts made me want to find out more about Bartolo Colon’s life. So I looked into it.

Thus, here are more 100% true facts (I’m not even kidding here) about Bartolo Colon you need to know:

  • Bartolo Colon grew up in a house in the Dominican Republic without interior plumbing, electric power, or running drinking water.
  • The Indians thought Colon was 18 years old when they signed him. He was actually 20 years old.
  • In the off season, Colon plays Friday night softball games in his home in the Dominican Republic—but exclusively as a hitter.
  • According to former and current teammate Ervin Santana, Colon is remarkably flexible:

“He’s very flexible, believe it or not,” said Santana, a rookie in 2005 and Colon’s teammate for three seasons. “He can lie on the ground and he can (lean forward and) touch his head to the ground, no problem. I don’t know how he did that, but I saw it.”

  • Colon keeps the game winning ball from each of his starts, decorating and numbering them artistically with colored pens. Here’s a picture of some.
  • Though Colon knows quite a bit of English, he insists—like Ichiro Suzuki—on using a translator to avoid being misunderstood, and perhaps to help shield his privacy.
  • During batting practice, Bartolo will sometimes stand at home plate and throw a ball over the outfield wall to impress his teammates.
  • Colon’s favorite pre-game music to listen to is Adele.
  • He loved his donkey, Pancho—a lot. In the baseball training facility he built in the Dominican Republic, Colon has a memorial to his beloved Pancho hanging on the wall.
  • Bartolo’s home town—Altamira—also has a baseball field with a life-sized statue of Colon at the entrance.

I just... can’t get over the fact Bartolo Colon is a real person. I could probably spend days look up more crazy facts about him. I love it.

SOURCES:

NY Times: Defying Time and Space

ESPN: In his 20th year in MLB, Bartolo Colón still loves this game

SFGate: Enigmatic Bartolo Colon is essential to amazing A's

Pioneer Press: ‘Big Sexy in the house’ — Bartolo Colon, 44, makes Twins debut Tuesday