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Monday Morning Macaroni Minnesota: Escobar strong, Mauer mean, Yankees make me unhappy

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The Twins are going to win the world series, btw

Minnesota Twins v Detroit Tigers Photo by Dave Reginek/Getty Images

Hey guys, I’m the girl with the links. I can hook you up!

  • With Miguel Sano being injured for the rest of time, Eduardo Escobar has stepped up and smashed a lot of dongs as his replacement. So many dongs, that even Escobar himself is surprised.
  • If you missed it: Joe Mauer, noted meanie-pants, destroyed a pitcher’s leg. He did this presumable to teach him to drink more milk to strengthen those bones.
  • The Twins are 33-89 against the Yankees since 2002 which shows that what I thought might be confirmation bias was actually real tangible sadness. Watch the Giambi walk-off grand slam if you feel like suicide today!

I’m getting to upset, so I’m going to play some music that soothes my angry soul.

  • Michael Hattery writing for fangraphs looks at how raising minor leaguer pay might benefit teams from a player development standpoint. In somewhat related news: I apparently have a really hard time remembering how to spell “Michael.”

Unrelated:

I still can’t decide what is better and I’ve spent an unreal amount of time thinking about it. THANKS JOE.