Tonight’s Twins game postponed

To use the vernacular, s**tcanned, a**-bagged, or “thrown out like a redheaded stepchild.”

No makeup date has been set, since this entire weekend’s weather is predicted to make you consider moving to Guam. (For the record: nice people, disturbingly large hermit crabs.)

All I can think of is the instance I was at a rainy, cold game in Target Field and it was turned off 90 minutes past scheduled start time. A hotdog-cart guy saw this postponement notice on the JumboTron and yelled, “THANK (bleeping) (Christian deity)” at the top of his lungs, which I agreed with 100%.

Glad they called this one sooner than that.