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Reds 8, Twins 2: Jose Berrios wasn’t too great today

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Berrios didn’t have a great day. More importantly, who the hell is Matt Magill?

Cincinnati Reds v Minnesota Twins
See? I love this picture too. Just not your day, Jose.
Photo by Adam Bettcher/Getty Images

Jose Berrios started for the Twins today against the Cincinnati Reds at Target Field. As expected, the Twins sucked an entire ass. They seem to be in to that lately.

Berrios only lasted 3.0 innings, and then was relieved by Taylor Rogers, who didn’t do much better. The former have up four runs, while the later gave up three. It wasn’t pretty.

After that, MATT MAGILL CAME IN TO PITCH FOR THE TWINS AND WHO IN THE ENTIRE FUCKING WORLD IS “MATT MAGILL”? I have LITERALLY never heard of this person. Like, are you all punk’in me right now? Seriously? This cannot be real. Who is this person and why is he pitching for the Twins!?

I know I am supposed to be the one explaining to you all what happened in the Twins game, but I’m just crying uncle here. Who in the ever living fuck is Matt Magill? What is even happening right now? Are we literally just calling fans out of left field like this is the Price is Right?

WHO IS MATT MAGILL AND WHERE DID HE COME FROM!?!?!

I quit.

ROBOT ROLLCALL!

Top Comments

# Recs Commenter Comment Link
5 Klawitter Like the old country song said, if today were a fish I'd throw it back
4 Cbrolin hey guys hows it goi...........
4 Klawitter Berrios has been terrible this game and against the Yankees
4 TeamCrazyMatt Right now there's a pitcher named Duffey
4 TJ Gorsegner You have no clue who says what in the locker room. Your Hawt Tayke is bad. Admit it
3 Asthix I think he might be a human male in his twenties
3 TawnyFroggy I miss winning.
3 James Fillmore Ispan
3 TeamCrazyMatt today's been a nice pile of poo
3 TJ Gorsegner You haven't given an answer! You say the manager and ONE player aren't leaders...
3 Imakesandwichesforaliving Lineups!
2 James Fillmore Right, but it’s still a crummy nothingburger of a solution to a real problem
2 James Fillmore The Jackie Chan movie we never got to see
2 RhinoandCompass Well, I'm glad they had the Reds after that tough series with the Yankees
2 Imakesandwichesforaliving Provus is imitating Harry Caray during a story
2 Coach Farmer No, you just have the worst hawt takes
2 Klawitter I do wonder if those 3 games with the White Sox hadn't been postponed
2 Klawitter The same Hrbek who didn't play on a team with a winning record until his 6th season?
2 James Fillmore That rule is so dumb
2 TJ Gorsegner This is where limiting mound visits actually can make the game longer
2 James Fillmore Now Sano has hamstring issues
2 Klawitter It's due to Thibs Dust blowing across the street from Target Center
1 MNWildcat Then he'd be Petit Gregor.
1 James Fillmore Lord Petit Gregor to you, commoner
1 montanatwinsfan you sure that's not your porn name?
1 James Fillmore At least it’s merely unhelpful
1 TJ Gorsegner Unfortunately, that doesn't help with the fact that we're in third place
1 TJ Gorsegner I dislike the fact that Grossman keeps starting over LaMarre
1 Gunnarthor Hello, sorry I'm late but we were doing spring cleaning and I forget the game was on at 1.
1 MNWildcat Huh.
1 Joel Hernandez It is sort of like giving coaches unlimited timeouts in NBA/NFL
1 CG19 We're fine
1 TJ Gorsegner Really? How about Escobar and Dozier? Both are respected as those guys
1 TJ Gorsegner I'd honestly prefer that... then you just quit caring and have fun
1 WolvesFan03 Wow
1 Klawitter GOAT WINS ZGODA
1 Klawitter I thought GiSC was being sarcastic
1 Asthix Go Twins go!!
1 TJ Gorsegner Well, that explains the sudden rash of injuries to our best players
1 Klawitter Indeed I am
1 Sportsavenue this is very frustrating
1 TJ Gorsegner Do you pay any attention to anything?