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Game 28: Twins @ White Sox

Well, on paper the Twins should win this one. But they don't play the games on paper. If baseball fields were covered in paper, they'd have lots of mouse nests. Mice love shredded paper.

Observe his mighty sword.
Observe his mighty sword.
Jonathan Daniel/Getty Images
Time: 7:10 Central. Vegas Line: -165 MIN / CHW +150
Weather: Clear & Calm, Start Temp 71°
Opponent's SB Site: South Side Sox
TV: FSN. Radio: Everything You Wanted To Know About Sturgis (But Were Afraid To Ask)

Daniel Palka is smokin' hot.

I don't mean he has a hot bat, although he does; he helped kill the Twins last night after getting his first four MLB hits in one game previously.

No -- I mean THIS kind of hot:

That low neckline! The stubble! The chain!

This is a look that says, "sorry I was late for Photo Day, I was in the hot tub with Ryan Gosling & Emma Watson. But I'll still bring my sultry gaze to your little team event thing."

The Twins lost Palka on waivers last November, because they needed a 40-man roster spot, and Palka's MiLB numbers just didn't project very well. Scouting reports on him years ago had Palka as a strong power bat who would strike out a lot, take few walks, and be serviceable (at best) on defense. That's pretty much how it happened during his Twins minor-league career. I'd probably rather have him now than Robbie Grossman -- but I'd prefer it if Zack Granite would get rolling and bring his glove to Minnesota.

In any case, let's hope the young man stays hot -- just not, this weekend, in the baseball sense. Let's also hope he no longer believes Oreos are sandwiches.

Starting for the Sox today is righthander Carson Fulmer. Only 24, he's in his third season, and had some success against lefties with his 88-MPH cutter. Unfortunately for him, he gives up a lot of walks. I mean, a LOT. 2018 Digits:

He wears glasses when pitching, which is usually a sign of great moral fiber. However, he also had a horrifically obnoxious fantasy wedding. If your wedding is featured in Brides magazine, you did it wrong.

Jose Berrios had rough outings his last two games, but he'll come around. Look at them numbers. Plus, MLB.com says he has the best curveball on the Twins staff! They wouldn't lie to us, would they?

Today's Lineups

MINNESOTA TWINS CHICAGO WHITE SOX
Joe Mauer - 1B Yoan Moncada - 2B
Brian Dozier - 2B Yolmer Sanchez - 3B
Max Kepler - RF Jose Abreu - 1B
Eddie Rosario - LF Nicky Delmonico - LF
Eduardo Escobar - 3B Matt Davidson - DH
Logan Morrison - DH Daniel Palka - RF
Ehire Adrianza - SS Leury Garcia - CF
Jason Castro - C Tim Anderson - SS
Ryan LaMarre - CF Omar Narvaez - C
Jose Berrios - RHP Carson Fulmer - RHP

Sexx Dragon is leading off!