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Monday Morning Minnesota: Ervin Santana fell into a black hole

Is apparently my chosen narrative today, I’m sorry.

American League Wild Card Game - Minnesota Twins v New York Yankees Photo by Al Bello/Getty Images
  • Ervin Santana still hasn’t touched 90 mph in live batting-practice, reports Mike Berardino of the P Press. Basically, as this is the Twins, we may as well assume he’s out infinite forevers. Since the space between any two points in an infinite number is an infinite number, Ervin Santana’s progress can be broken down into infinite infinitely small pieces which can not be witnessed as they are infinitely far away. However, as they are assumed to happen at some point, unobservable to us, we can assume his recovery to be past the event horizon from which not even light can escape, swirling around with all of the things that have ever happened and ever will happen. What the hell am I talking about?
  • Speaking of starting pitchers (Wow, smooth transition!) The Runner Sports wonders if the Twins could land Mets stars Jacob Degrom and Noah Syndergaard. Y’know, assuming they wanted to.
  • When prospect Royce Lewis was taken #1 by the Twins 2017, his dad was all “oh btw I’ve been friends with Torii Hunter for years, lol.” The Orange County Register has the story (Thankfully written in a less horrible way than this preview of it.)
  • If you are like me and like both history and baseball whilst also retaining a healthy love of obscure minutiae; this piece for the Anchorage Daily News looks back 150 years at Alaska’s first ever baseball team.

Today’s soundtrack is Final Fantasy VI BUT METAL.