Monday Morning Minnesota: Sign Every Pitcher Edition

Previously on the Twinkie Town website, which is this website right here:

• Zach crafted up the roster for a Twins ALL-DECADE team. Only 7 more decades until they can form an All-Century team. 40 decades after that we’ll get that Minnesota Twins Cohort. 432 decades after that the Twins Legion will be fully formed and we can finally defeat that darned Vercingetorix.
• Old friend turned current friend Cooper Carlson wrote my favorite facebook comments bait of this young offseason with "If Buxton can stay healthy in 2020, he will be a superstar.”
• A sandwich with fingers with which to type covered the Silver Slugger SCelebration surrounding Mitch Garver and Nelson Cruz’s new hardware.
• Our Grading the 2019 Twins series continues with both Tyler Duffey and a CONTROVERSIAL grading of Jorge Polanco. Go vote on those, because voting is rad.

Elsewhere in Twins Territory:

• Sunday’s edition of Fangraph’s weekly Sunday Notes column includes a talk with Twins pitching coach Wes Johnson on the constant tiny bio-mechanical “tune-ups” that helped the Twins pitching staff go from “bad” in 2018 to “Pretty good unless it you are playing the Yankees because Minnesota is a cursed and godless land that shall never see joy.” Also included further down is nothing less than some great Brad Radke trivia.
• MLBTR released its yearly top 50 free agent list w/predictions. They see the Twins landing Madison Bumgarner, (Hopefully, there are so many weird puns to be made. Madison Bumgartner snake.) resigning Jake Odorizzi, nabbing Will Smith (another name ripe for bad jokes) and for some reason signing .... Howie Kendrick?
• The team announced some baseball ops promotions in case you are into that kind of thing. I won’t judge.
• Chris Schad of Puckett’s Pond wonders if the Twins newfound pitching coach chops could fix former ace Chris Archer. Sounds like a fun reclamation project to me!
• Max Kepler is a good baseball player. He’s also apparently from Germany? Huh. First I’m hearing about that. Anyway, dude is helping the game’s popularity grow abroad.
• Twins Daily has the scoop on potentially even more coaches being poached by other organizations. Good problem to have, I suppose. Like how I know my cooking is good because the mice that live in my walls keep stealing it.

The Wide World of Baseball Z

• Beyond the Box Score took a deeper look at the Fresh Prince Will Smith himself, and the value he holds with a Qualifying Offer attached to him.
• The MLBPA is investigating the Braves GM after he used some really collusiony like language, but don’t worry guys there is no way billion dollar businesses or their officials would ever do something like that.

Today’s soundtrack is from Fire Emblem Gaiden, I’ve used before and I don’t care because I love this song.