Monday Morning Minnesota: Rest and Relaxation Edition

Previously on Twinkie Town:

• Twins lost again, if you want to read about that Brandon did a great job recapping it!

Elsewhere in Twins Territory:

• Twins Daily has a couple of good reads that bring up good questions. First, Patrick Wozniak looks forward to the Twins post season rotation. (Yes you depressing sacks of pessimism, the Twins will probably be in the post-season.) Then, Andrew Thares wonders if it is time to find a new role for the struggling Martin Perez. Good pitcher again would be a fun role, in my opinion.
• According to Aaron Gleeman and just, like, math, the Twins are probably going to break the single season home run record, or as I like to call it the “Full year dong crown.”
• I don’t remember if we reported on this, but the Twins traded some cash dollars for some minor leaguer you probably don’t care about. But Tawny, you exclaim at your computer, I thought the trade deadline passed! It did! However you can still trade dudes who don’t have a major league contract. Apparently.
• The Star Tribune has a fun little piece on the Twins historian’s life long quest for a special ball. This quest is similar to one of my own where I saw a cool sparkly super ball in a vending machine and spent like 6 dollars to get it. Ah, to be 25 again.

Around the Horn:

• The Ringer looks at one of the rarest feats in baseball. No, not the perfect game. Not the cycle. Just the home plate umpire calling every pitch correctly.
• Robot Umps When?
• Robot Overlords When?
• beep bloop blorp we have replaced TJ with a robot
• Fangraphs has a bunch of gifs (and words, but I just like watching balls go far. Reading is for squares.) of dingers off of pitches that shouldn’t even be swung at in the first place. I love watching these.

Today’s soundtrack is some of the most wicked drum beats the Master System could produce.