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Friday Morning Minnesota: Old friends and illnesses edition

Plus the Coronavirus, cheese making, and how not to ride an airplane.

Minnesota Twins Photo Day Photo by Julio Aguilar/Getty Images

I was out for the week with Bilateral Plague Having (BPH) and now I’m back in action to write this week’s Monday Morning Minnesota just in time for everyone’s favorite Monday of the week, Friday! Forgive me if my links are stagnant, I’m behind! And with that lets see what all you nerds have been up to lately.

Previously on Twinkie Town:

Elsewhere in Twins Territory:

Old Friend News:

Around the World in Bases and Balls

OId Timey Baseball of the Week: Len Koenecke

Our short-but-insane tale starts with former Fireman Len Koenecke signing with the New York Giants in 1931 for 75k. His manager John McGraw predicted he would be a “bright star” in the National League. Len went hitless in his debut, and lasted only one season with the Giants, causing thousands to do whatever the 1930s of subtweeting McGraw for his sterling prediction.

Koenecke landed in the International League with the Buffalo Bisons, where he hit his way back into the NL with the Brooklyn Dodgers, where in his first season he set a record for fielding percentage with .994 while getting 73 of the old-timey RBIs. Unfortunately his numbers evaporated in his second season in Brooklyn, where his drinking problem caused him to get cut from the team in the middle of a road trip in Chicago.

During his flight home, our “hero” got drunk on whiskey, hit a stewardess, and had to be sat-on by the pilot until he was handcuffed to his seat. He was removed from the flight, unconscious, in Detroit (presumably comically throw out of the plane by his suspenders and landing on his chin as the pilot exaggeratedly washed his hands of the situation.) and slept in a chair at the airport for a bit. He then boarded a flight heading to Toronto, hoping to re-up with the Bisons.

On the flight he got in a fight with the pilot, because of course he did, and did what we all would do in that situation and tried to commandeer the flight. To prevent a drunken disgraced baseballer from crashing the plane, the pilot and a passenger struck Len over the head with a fire extinguisher. The plane made an emergency landing on a race track in Toronto, but Koenecke was already dead of a cerebral hemorrhage. Both men were found not to be liable for the death.

Don’t drink and fly, kids.

This Week’s Soundtrack: Content Warning: Big Spooooooky