“Got Milk” has come out of retirement—should Joe Mauer be next?

The famous “Got Milk” ad campaign is back. The advertisements, which often featured celebrities and pro athletes with milk mustaches, ran from 1993 until 2014 before being retired. With all of the changes to everyday life over the past few months, driven by the pandemic, milk sales have soared.

According to the Milk Processor Education Program “When Americans were faced with tough times they bought more milk – and not just during the initial “stock up” phases of the pandemic. Shoppers have continued to buy milk at rates not seen in years, with milk sales at retail up about 4 percent year-to-date. Milk is an “essential” for home meals – for milk drinkers, 80 percent of their milk is consumed at home. Parents chose to buy milk because they trust it for its nutrition, versatility, and taste. In fact, 72 percent of moms said that milk was their number one must-have as the stay-at-home orders hit, above staples like bread, eggs and vegetables.”

In response, and in order to capitalize on increased demand, the dairy industry has brought back its most famous slogan.

In these parts, however, another milk commercial from that era is more famous.

That’s right.

And, just like the folks who bought milk as a comfort in trying times, many Twins fans are also attempting to turn to a comforting commodity.

The fan-backed campaign to bring Joe Mauer back comes at a time when the Twins are getting poor offensive production from both positions he used to play. At catcher, Mitch Garver is hitting .152/.259/.217. Miguel Sano, at first base, has struggled in a couple recent series against division rival Kansas City. This seems to have prompted the calls for career .306/.388/.409 hitter to return to the diamond.

One fan we spoke to said “I was trying to be healthier in 2019, so I started buying almond milk. I really liked this Mitch Garber (sic) guy too. But with how crazy the world is, lets go with what we know. I’m buying 2%, and its time to bring back Joe Mauer.”

In a message sent to the Twinkie Town Facebook account, a man named Tom had a lot to say on the topic as well. The message read, in part, “Look, if we’re gonna pay some guy $23 million a year to be hurt, it might as well be Joe Mauer. He’s one of us you know. This Donaldson guy, what’s that all about? He took the money and suddenly his leg hurts? Bring back Joe. I’d rather have a lazy guy I can trust to disappoint me.”

Former Twins’ manager Ron Gardenhire, when asked about the campaign to bring Mauer back, said “Milk? Who drinks milk? That always was one of the weird things about Joe. Now PBR, that’s where its at.” Mauer’s other former manager, Paul Molitor, was characteristically unavailable for comments.

A Twins official, on the condition of anonymity, confirmed that the team has received “literally dozens” of letters from around the Twin Cities metro, demanding that the team find a way to bring the former first overall pick out of retirement.

Further information from our source suggests that the team did reach out to Mauer’s camp, and was told “No way guys, the missus wouldn’t be alright with that.”