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Pirates 6, Twins 5: Taylor Rogers proven mortal

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Twins win series but fail to get the sweep.

MLB: Minnesota Twins at Pittsburgh Pirates Charles LeClaire-USA TODAY Sports

Going for the sweep of the Pirates, a team with such players as “That one guy.” and “Wait where does Andrew McCutchen play now?” the Twins stumbled at the very last moment.

It was a battle of the dongs on the high seas of Pennsylvania, with the Twins striking first with a 3 run blast off the bat of Miguel Sano, but in the next inning Pittsburgh responded when Gregory Polanco did the same thing. Twins starter Kenta Maeda was otherwise solid, and the Pirates’ bats would be silent until the last few innings.

The Twins would tack on a run in the 4th and 5th with solo shots by Byron Buxton and Eddie Rosario, and head into the 8th with a two run lead and the excellent Sergio Romo and Homeric hero Taylor Rogers ready to pitch the next two innings and secure the sweep, or the swab of their poop deck, if you will.

Romo got into trouble quickly, walking Jarrod Dyson, who then stole second on the very next pitch. Adam Frazier flied out weakly to left, keeping Dyson at second, but that didn’t matter in any way because Dyson then immediately stole third. Phillip Evans then grounded out and the Twins conceded the run, diminishing their lead down to one.

The bottom of the 9th then came, and Taylor Rogers faced the Redbeard himself, Colin Moran. Moran singled, Bryan Reynolds doubled, and suddenly things were looking very out of hand. Rogers managed to strike out Gregory Polanco for the first out, but pinch hitter and swashbucker Kevin Newman singled up the middle, scoring two and walking off with the win.

The Twins Territory Armada was forced to retreat from the sea-dog menace, their Bomba Squad Cannons unable to finish the job.

STUDS: Jorge Polanco (3 for 4) and Miguel Sano (3 run dong.)

DUDS: Taylor Rogers (Who is still elite, btw.)

ROBOT ROLL CALL!!!!

The Tawny Award for best Comment, presented by Tawny, goes to... TAWNY for “Do not rec Joel.” I think that comment meant a lot of things to a lot of people. Have a nice rest of the week!