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Slow: Tortuga Pitching shirts are here, and you know you need one

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The other night, in a blowout loss to the Angels, the Twins did the one thing left in their arsenal to keep me interested in the game — they put Willians Astudillo on the mound.

Their super-utility man came through, pitching a clean inning to finish the game. He also put up some hilariously solid advanced stat numbers, but of course this is the smallest of small samples.

The best part of this was this his pitches ranged between 46 and 72 miles per hour, speeds attainable by even an old Volkswagen.

If you missed it, here is every glorious pitch in one compilation

Now Breaking T, as their slogan (“Wear the moment”) suggests, has a fantastic T-Shirt celebrating the moment(s) in question.

This just drips pure “sexiness,” right? You don’t even have to be a Twins fan to appreciate it. The shirt has the usual quality and comfort found in Breaking T products, which is to say a lot of both. It comes in Adult and Youth T-Shirt sizes, and in a hoodie, with prices ranging from $24 to $54 depending on the size and style you prefer.

Click here to purchase, and as always, this is an affiliate link.