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It would be a game for the ages

Minnesota Twins v Boston Red Sox Photo by Adam Glanzman/Getty Images

So what would it take to get me in a seat at Target Field at the dog end of this moribund 2021 Twins season? Keep in mind that for me it is a two hour drive, parking, tickets, sometimes parking tickets, concessions….not a simple, spontaneous jaunt.

Well if the Twins brass actually reads Twinkie Town, I have two suggestions. The first? Discount every ticket one dollar for every game the team is out of first place. That would be pretty radical, although I suspect they’d increase attendance and make up the difference on concessions. But there is another option, and one that would be more inspiring.

Allow La Tortuga to play all nine positions.

I mean, why not. The man (if indeed he is truly human) can clearly do it. And it would give the long suffering Twins fans something to applaud, something to tell later fair weather types about in an “I was there” sort of way.

As near as I can tell this feat has been accomplished only five times in the history of the Major Leagues, and the Twins appear to have been involved in most of them.

Casar Tovar did it for the Twins in 1968. Interestingly he started out pitching and the first man he faced was the only player ever to play all nine before him, Bert Campaneris of the Oakland A’s. Shane Halter did it on the last day of the 2000 season playing for the Tigers. The most recent was also a Tiger, Andrew Romine who managed a 3-2 victory over the Twins at Target Field.

There’s a lot to like about this idea. Willians Astudillo is beloved by all, but realistically as the team improves he may not be around that much longer. Let him go out in style. We’d also be saving a little wear and tear on young pitching arms.

Looking ahead at the schedule I see a three game series against the Tigers at the end of September. C’mon Twins, lets make this happen. Neither team is playoff bound and it would be great fun to continue this peculiar tradition.

Tortuga Coast to Coast!