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Game 44: Twins at Dodgers

“Dodge this.” -Trinity

MLB: Minnesota Twins at Los Angeles Dodgers
Minnesotan-Ice Cold.
Gary A. Vasquez-USA TODAY Sports

(in the style of Tom Lehrer)

Swing it here!
A-sa-wa-ing it here!
Have a hot dog and have a beer.
Try to ensnare any foul souvenir;
It’s the spring! I know! Let’s go see the Show!

And there’s one team the Twins have to beat for me,
Drag every last man to defeat for me...

All the world seems aflame in the midst of this game
When we’re pummeling Dodgers in their park.
On this Wednesday you’ll stay as star Sonny Gray
Is there pummeling Dodgers in their park.
When they attempt batting, our hurlers will press ‘em in;
They’ll return to the dugout a mortified specimen!
The Twins in this fight of a pastime delight
Will be pummeling Dodgers in the park!

This team is sensational
And standing-ovational,
And our rising reputation’ll
Precede wins.
We’re found inspirational
And smooth-operational;
Now this generation’ll
Be noteworthy Twins!
And it won’t offend any old codgers
To want to beat up on the Dodgers...

So if Wednesday you’re free, why not travel and see
As we pummel the Dodgers in their park.
Los Angeles, vexed, knows the Angels are next
While we’re pummeling Dodgers in their park.
Our fanbase is thrilled, each supporter excitable,
Hearts filled with a flame, every spirit ignitable!
This top squad we’re bettering;
We’re certain to get a ring
Come end of October — no fan will be sober!
We’re pummeling Dodgers in their park!

Today's Lineups

Joey Gallo - RF Mookie Betts - RF
Alex Kirilloff - 1B Freddie Freeman - 1B
Carlos Correa - SS Will Smith - C
Byron Buxton - DH Max Muncy - 3B
Jorge Polanco - 2B Jason Heyward - DH
Trevor Larnach - LF Miguel Vargas - 2B
Nick Gordon - CF James Outman - CF
Willi Castro - 3B Chris Taylor - SS
Christian Vazquez - C Trayce Thompson - LF
Sonny Gray - RHP Dustin May - RHP