Triple-A: Rochester Red Wings 9, Lehigh Valley IronPigs 0 [Game 2]
Yeah, SNAP, Lehigh Valley! Rochester just OWNED you! All all-bullpen pitching squad put them IronPigs in their place, including Mr. Michael Tonkin and Sir D.J. Baxendale. Zack Granite, who we all hate now, went 2-4, as did OF/1B Matt Hague and OF J.B. Schuck. C Mitch Garver went 2-3, which is statistically better.
Triple-A: Lehigh Valley IronPigs 2, Rochester Red Wings 1 [Game I]
Oh, wait, there was also this one. Rochester, you suck. I am so ashamed to live in the same hemisphere. Five pitchers (including unholy switch-pitcher Pat Venditte) combined at holding the Red Wings to only one hit, which was only one ByungHo Park double, and only one run, which was a sac fly.
In old friend news, Lehigh Valley’s Pedro Florimon finished 4-6 on the day. P-Flo surges again!
Double-A: Chattanooga Lookouts 0, Mississippi Braves 0 (Suspended)
WHAT!!! Is Bud Selig back from
the dead retirement and up to his evil tricks again? Nope, it just got all rainy in the third inning, and didn’t stop.
High-A: St. Lucie Mets spa, Ft. Myers Miracle whirlpool
Apparently God took, literally, the prayers of millions to let Her Most Humble Servant, Mets limelight avoider Tim Tebow, have thousands of blessings rained upon his head. The rain, baby, it did doth fall.
Low-A: Clinton LumberKings 2, Cedar Rapids Kernels 1 (11 innings)
One of those “learning experiences” for Cedar Rapids, as while every player got one hit apiece (except slacker 1B Amaurys Miner), they still only managed the one all-Butera-esque run.
Nervous Muppet Clark Beeker started for the Mean Corn, and only gave up the one run in six innings. Your goat here was Crime Dog Patrick McGuff, who got walked off on his eighth pitch by something called a Yojhan Quevedo. I, for one, would rather get homered from a guy like that with a bitchin’ name than a dude named Lance Jones or some such.
Rookie League: Elizabethton Twins 7, Danville Braves 4
Baby Twins to the rescue of Farm System honor! A homer by LF Brent Rooker and multi-knock games from 2B Carson Crites & CF Mark Contreras were all starter Melvi Acosta and reliever Calvin Faucher needed to get the win. I must say, Melvi/Calvin has a good tandem ring to it.