Triple-A: Pawtucket Red Sox 5, Rochester Red Wings 3
The seventh inning was frustrating for Rochester RHP Michael “Rathuv” Kohn. He walked a guy, promptly picked him off first, then served up a go-ahead homer to the next guy. “It just goes to show you,” he told clubhouse reporter Mayduhp Kwoht. “Life has no purpose or meaning, and all our efforts are doomed to failure. What else can you expect from ugly bags of mostly water, on an insignificant planet, in the midst of a vast and uncaring universe?” When asked to elaborate, Kohn indicated he would continue playing, since “the guys here enjoy my fart jokes.”
1B Byungho Park and SS Tommy Field both had multi-hit nights for the Red Wings. Starter Felix Jorge was pulled after throwing 64 pitches, so he might be a candidate to start for the Twins on Wednesday, although he did surrender three runs, so he’s definitely a candidate to start for the Twins on Wednesday.
Double-A: Chattanooga Lookouts 4, Montgomery Biscuits 3
Despite having no walks between them, DH/OF Edgar Corcino, LF LaMonte Wade, and RF Max Murphy, the Pride of Robbinsdale, amassed seven hits together. One of Wade’s was a two-run dinger. Every Lookout got a hit except SS Nick Gordon, for whom this was sad.
In an intentionally split start, Kohl Stewart got the first nod, and D.J. Baxendale the most work, allowing no runs in his 4.2 IP.
Chattanooga has clinched a playoff berth; their regular season ends Sept. 10.
High-A: Ft. Myers Miracle 4, Jupiter Hammerheads 1
What planet does Jupiter align with in the 60’s song? Mars. What famous radio broadcast was about a Mars invasion? War Of The Worlds. Who was behind it? Orson Welles. Who pitched five shutout innings against Jupiter on Saturday? That’s right, LHP Lachlan Wells. Do I have to draw you a diagram, folks? Connect the dots!
Also partying in the seventh house were C Mitchell Kranson, who went 3-4, and 1B Zander Wiel, who launched his 13th dong of the year into the astral plane. IF Sean Miller, CF Tanner English, SS Jermaine Palacios, and LF/IF Ariel Montesino all had multi-hit nights as well (which makes one surprised the Miracle didn’t score more runs). Montesino’s team photo kinda looks like he’s visiting Earth from an alien world.
Low-A: Cedar Rapids Kernels 4, Beloit Snappers 2
Eat it, Wisconsin! (Don’t actually be insulted, as I’ll be staying in your fine state tonight.) LHP Bryan Sammons dealt six strikeouts in five innings, which is cool; Crime Dog Partick McGuff K’d two in the last two frames. Lotsa hits for the Mean Corn; 2B Travis Blankenhorn did the triple, while CF Aaron Whitefield, DH/OF Shane Carrier, and 3B Jordan “Vidal” Gore had two singles apiece.
Rookie League: Rain Eats Playoffs
In the most minor-league thing imaginable, the first game of Baby Twins playoffs was rained out. No need for a double-header today, they can just add games to the schedule through eternity if necessary. Scheduled start is at 5:00 Central in Greenevile, TN.
Do you have a picture or pictures you took of tractors, farm animals, land, or other equipment you’d like to see us use for a future farm report? We would love your submissions and happily give you and/or your farm full credit and a shout-out.
Please e-mail myjah at Maija.Varda@gmail.com if you are interested, and include the name of who took the photo (and their permission) so we may give the proper photo credits. If Fillmore uses the photo, though, he’ll just steal it and give you nothing, that’s the kind of guy he is.
Photos must be large! We need at least 1800px width. If you’re not sure if it’s big enough, send the picture and I will tell you (TWSS).